August 1998 - Sinister - missprint.org

Sinister: i pity the fool
by butterfly mcqueen 27 Aug '98

27 Aug '98

+---+ HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINISTER BABIES +---+ hey. i haven't seen the actual album cover yet, but someone mailed me a copy of the next little story that will accompany the album: ________________________________________________ Sebastian had taken to pinching Belle's ass. She didn't mind. She had taken to wearing no panties, so as not to feel anything between her cheeks and the soft, supple tips of Sebastian's fingers. "Baby got back!" Sebastian was heard to scream out on a regular basis. "I like big butts and I cannot lie". While Belle knew this was sexist and she should rebel against it, she couldn't help but feel aroused and curious. And more the latter. One thing led to another, and Belle got pregnant. The thing was...she didn't know whose it was. It was like something straight out of a Montel show. It could've been Richard's. Those three weeks in Brazil left her sore. Or it could be Stevie's. Ahhhh....poor little Stevie. Cursed with such a small member, she couldn't help but feel pity. The fifty bucks he gave her didn't hurt, either. But deep in her heart she knew it was Stuart David's. She could hear the baby late at night kicking and screaming in the womb going "Let me out of here. This is pish!" Chris had taken notice of the changes in his friends, and this started a flurry of activity in his drug addled brain. He had so many schemes cooked up he couldn't keep up with them all. He decided he was gonna extort money from Mr. Murdoch. He was gonna threaten to give a real, proper interview if he didn't have a large paper bag full of money sitting on his doorstep by 6AM. Of course, Murder One (as he had taken to calling himself after the formation of his gangsta rap side project, the Bus-Tang Clan) didn't stand for it. As Wee Chris was injecting some unknown fluid through the veins in his penis, Murder burst through the door and jacked his fool ass up. "Bitch" he spat. "Nobody fucks with Murder One, fool." The band was failing. No one was getting along anymore. Only Sarah still showed a bit of interest, when she wasn't out pimping Mick Cooke out to other bands. "100 dollars for a blow" she was known to say. Poor Mick had turned tricks for so many bands he couldn't keep up. He started playing Belle and Sebastian bits in the Amphetameanies songs and Amphetameanie bits in Belle and Sebastian songs. Murder had a hit put out on him. But now they've got their shit together. They're writing songs again. It's kind of hard for Mick to play trumpet cause Murder had it rammed up his ass to teach him a lesson. Belle brings her baby, Raoul, to every practice. Wee Chris has kicked the smack. Stuart D took an anger management class. And the rest of the band has finally learned not to "fuck with the formula". Everything's coming up roses. ________________________________________________ -brad +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Re: Sinister: Re: your mail
by Rachael Bristol 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

+---+ HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINISTER BABIES +---+ French movies where a child is the main character? My favorite is Toto Le Hero. Especially the part where the little boy licks his sister's hand. Absolutment, Rachael Bristol ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: please help maybe if you are nice...
by ahalter 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

+---+ HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINISTER BABIES +---+ the thing is that a newish almost friend of mine who i am hoping will really be my friend shortly has made me a tape that has all these hefner songs on it and i think its lovely but unfortunately its impossible for me to find and believe me ive looked... so my query to all you nice people is this = can anyone get me the hefner album? ive no idea what it is even called silly me... but i do mean the real live album and not just a tape of it... i would of course pay whatever it costs and all the shipping that might be needed and all of that... i would greatly appreciate it... please mail me privately so as not to muck up the list with all of this thanks! sitting here hopefully allison +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: oops?
by JonnyKat＠aol.com 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

my friends, lest you all think i'm insane for repeating myself, my post from last sunday just, um, sent itself back to the list. hmmm... sorry, jonny : ) +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: we have lost even this twilight
by JonnyKat＠aol.com 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

my friends and fellow sinisterines i write to you from brooklyn again where not every sunday can be spent reading poetry in the sun and drinking pomegranate juice and not every sunday can be spent listening to fresh new vinyl (some italian swing from the sixties and a little south american psychedelia) but this one was this one. was. much love to all jonny (jonnykat) (jonnydream) XXXXXOOOOO +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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None
by Sam Devere 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

Ok, so this described my college life. I desired being a professional student and worked at the library the entire time I was in school. Where else are you gonna find 'shunned' pubs like Christopher Street? Where else would you meet a former decorated Vet and Navy Seal who currently is librarian who also is a yoga and ballet instructor? In other words, where else do you meet cool freaks? Ok, library story time. My boss once walked into a small study office - one that contains a small window - and saw some guy wanking off to an issue of L'Express. My question is....um, why L'Express? :). Sam Date: Mon, 24 Aug 1998 14:19:56 EDT From: Delaware9(a)aol.com Subject: Sinister: Rolling Stone review of TBWTAS It's the soundtrack to staying too long in your college neighborhood and becoming one of those types who hold down library jobs. Jess PS And what was that librarian crack?? check out http://www.comnet.ca/~rina/index.html if you have a problem with librarians! ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: a short story for you
by Cassell Professional Publishing 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

I hope you all like this. It only takes a few minutes to read. *On Seeing the 100 percent Perfect Girl One Beautiful April Morning* by Haruki Murakami One beautiful April morning, on a narrow side street in Tokyo's fashionable Harajuku neighbourhood, I walk past the 100 percent perfect girl. Tell you the truth, she's not that good-looking. She doesn't stand out in any way. Her clothes are nothing special. The back of her hair is still bent out of shape from sleep. She isn't young, either - must be near thirty, not even close to a 'girl', properly speaking. But still, I know from fifty yards away: She's the 100 percent perfect girl for me. The moment I see her, there's a rumbling in my chest, and my mouth is as dry as a desert. Maybe you have your own particular favourite type of girl - one with slim ankles, say, or big eyes, or graceful fingers, or you're drawn for no good reason to girls who take their time with every meal. I have my own preferences, of course. Sometimes in a restaurant I'll catch myself staring at the girl at the table next to mine because I like the shape of her nose. But no one can insist that his 100 percent perfect girl correspond to some preconceived type. Much as I like noses, I can't recall the shape of hers - or even if she had one. All I can remember for sure is that she was no great beauty. It's weird. - Yesterday on the street I passed the 100 percent perfect girl, I tell someone. - Yeah? he says. Good looking? - Not really. - Your favourite type, then? - I don't know. I can't seem to remember anything about her - the shape of her eyes or the size of her breasts. - Strange. - Yeah. Strange. - So anyhow, he says, already bored, what did you do? Talk to her? Follow her? - Nah. Just passed her on the street. She's walking east to west, and I west to east. It's a really nice April morning. Wish I could talk to her. Half an hour would be plenty: just ask her about herself, tell her about myself, and - what I'd really like to do - explain to her the complexities of fate that have led to our passing each other on a side street in Harajuku on a beautiful April morning in 1981. This was something sure to be crammed full of warm secrets, like an antique clock built when peace filled the world. After talking, we'd have lunch somewhere, maybe see a Woody Allen movie, stop by a hotel bar for cocktails. With any kind of luck, we might end up in bed. Potentiality knocks on the door of my heart. Now the distance between us has narrowed to fifteen yards. How can I approach her? What should I say? - Good morning, miss. Do you think you could spare half an hour for a little conversation? Ridiculous. I'd sound like an insurance salesman. - Pardon me, but would you happen to know if there is an all-night cleaners in the neighbourhood? No, this is just as ridiculous. I'm not carrying any laundry, for one thing. Who's going to buy a line like that? Maybe the simple truth would do. - Good morning. You are the 100 percent perfect girl for me. No, she wouldn't believe it. Or even if she did, she might not want to talk to me. Sorry, she could say, I might be the 100 percent perfect girl for you, but you're not the 100 percent perfect boy for me. It could happen. And if I found myself in that situation, I'd probably go to pieces. I'd never recover from the shock. I'm thirty-two, and that's what growing older is all about. We pass in front of a flower shop. A small, warm air mass touches my skin. The asphalt is damp, and I catch the scent of roses. I can't bring myself to speak to her. She wears a white sweater, and in her right hand she holds a crisp white envelope lacking only a stamp. So: she's written somebody a letter, maybe spent the whole night writing, to judge from the sleepy look in her eyes. The envelope could contain every secret she's ever had. I take a few more strides and turn: She's lost in the crowd. Now, of course, I know exactly what I should have said to her. It would have been a long speech, though, far too long for me to have delivered it properly. The ideas I come up with are never very practical. Oh well. It would have started: Once upon a time, and ended: A sad story, don't you think? Once upon a time, there lived a boy and a girl. The boy was eighteen and the girl sixteen. He was not unusually handsome, and she was not especially beautiful. They were just an ordinary lonely boy and an ordinary lonely girl, like all the others. But they believed with their whole hearts that somewhere in the world there lived the 100 percent perfect boy and the 100 percent perfect girl for them. Yes, they believed in a miracle. And that miracle actually happened. One day, the two came upon each other on the corner of a street. - This is amazing, he said. I've been looking for you all my life. You may not believe this, but you are the 100 percent perfect girl for me. - And you, she said to him, are the 100 percent perfect boy for me, exactly as I'd pictured you in every detail. It's like a dream. They sat on a park bench, held hands, and told each other their stories hour after hour. They were not lonely any more. They had found and been found by their 100 percent perfect other. What a wonderful thing it is to find and be found by your 100 percent perfect other. It's a miracle, a cosmic miracle. As they sat and talked, however, a tiny, tiny sliver of doubt took root in their hearts: Was it really all right for one's dreams to come true so easily? And so, when there came a momentary lull in their conversation, the boy said to the girl: - Let's test ourselves, just once. If we really are each other's 100 percent perfect lovers, then sometime, somewhere, we will meet again without fail. And when that happens, and we know that we are the 100 percent perfect ones, we'll marry then and there. What do you think? - Yes, she said, that is exactly what we should do. And so they parted, she to the east, and he to the west. The test they had agreed upon, however, was utterly unnecessary. They should never have undertaken it, because they really and truly were each other's 100 percent perfect lovers, and it was a miracle that they had ever met. But it was impossible for them to know this, young as they were. The cold, indifferent waves of fate proceeded to toss them unmercifully. One winter, both the boy and the girl came down with the season's terrible influenza, and after drifting for weeks between life and death they lost all memory of their earlier years. When they awoke, their heads were as empty as the young DH Lawrence's piggy bank. They were two bright, determined people, however, and through their unremitting efforts they were able to acquire once again the knowledge and feeling that qualified them to return as fully-fledged members of society. Heaven be praised, they became truly upstanding citizens who knew how to transfer from one subway line to another, who were fully capable of sending a special-delivery letter at the post office. Indeed, they even experienced love again, sometimes as much as 75 percent or even 85 percent love. Time passed with shocking swiftness, and soon the boy was thirty-two, the girl thirty. One beautiful April morning, in search of a cup of coffee to start the day, the boy was walking from west to east, while the girl, intending to send a special-delivery letter, was walking from east to west, both along the same narrow street in the Harajuku neighbourhood of Tokyo. They passed each other in the very centre of the street. The faintest gleam of their lost memories glimmered for the briefest moment in their hearts. Each felt a rumbling in their chest. And they knew: She is the 100 percent perfect girl for me. He is the 100 percent perfect boy for me. But the glow of their memories was far too weak, and their thoughts no longer had the clarity of fourteen years earlier. Without a word, they passed each other, disappearing into the crowd. Forever. A sad story, don't you think? Yes, that's it. That is what I should have said to her. **************************************************************************** ******************************* Take care, DAVID +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: looking for one of you to...
by Sandra Duric 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

this goes out to all listees... and do let me know if postings such as these are absolute no-no's sammi and i do a zine called idoru - is anyone interested in doing an in-depth feature on B&S as well as a review of the upcoming album??? we're looking for passion, accurate info and artwork... email me at ajduric(a)hotmail.com or sammi at idoruzine(a)hotmail.com starlingsunflower "rain or shine" +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Gilliam - Brazil
by Martin, Ezra 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

Since we're speaking of Brazil, for those in NYC, there's a good article about 'Brazil' in this week's Voice. It's actually playing on the big screen starting this Friday at the Film Forum, and I'm very excited about this! Hope to see some of you there... Ezra +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Looper at the beatroom
by Chris Leonard 26 Aug '98

26 Aug '98

Last night miss julia and I attended the Beatroom recording of Looper and V-Twin in the lovely lovely plush Polo Lounge in Glasgow. It was great, it was full of like minded gay homosexuals who winked at me as I minced about laughing fayly. There was also one of those boys who dresses up as a lady and tells rude jokes. I found that a little scary, basically cos her colours did nothing for her and her hair was a mess. And that was just upstairs! Downstairs they were filming the thing. Now this was my first step into the world of television, and I reckon I was pretty good. I played the part of someone in the pub, watching some bands play. I was instructed to act naturally, like I was really enjoying myself. It took me a while to get the motivation right, but once I did I was great. By the end of the thing I was even clapping and whooping at the same time. Looper played four songs I think- the single, something with a wee megaphone, festival95 and spaceboy one. Someone said: Isn't it funny how this is filming for digital tv, so that the sound will be crystal clear. Then Loopy Stuart goes and sings through a mini megaphone, to make it all distorted. "Faced with reality in a dream" or what. Tube. It was very sweet I like looper. Now then, as you know I've never been one to voice my opinions but this will change now. I had never seen V-Twin before but I had heard and quite enjoyed that "gifted" song. But my god they are pish. Wee Chris was rockin out on the guitar on one tune which was entertaining. Or it would have been if they were any use. Utter shite. My acting abilities were really pushed to the limit to play the pleased punter in the pub after that monstrosity. I'm sure they're nice lads an that though. <all opinions expressed here are my own and in no way reflect the opinions of my employer> And that was about it. Miss Julia and I returned upstairs where she wanted to watch the drag act but I pulled her out forcefully, crying. Hello! to the sleepy challenged listee Calumn who we met last night. Hello Calumn. Cheerio, Christopher. +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister(a)majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo(a)majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +---+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+

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