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Sinister: haikus revealed // weeks fourfifteen // two thousand and two
by ee fumblings 22 Apr '02

22 Apr '02

I have forgotten them all so I will just talk about B&S instead. Tactful. I wasn't in drag, I wasn't even dressed questionably. Will wee stu end up like Compo? It's enough to bring tears to the eyes. All have been very amusing, but not for the right reasons, I'm sure. Speaking of Marks, well done to Big Gay Mark C, on recent employment. A guest in their flat. Anticipating garden parties in summer. First of all, there was the picnic. Which was grate (do people still use that?). OK, fine, but that's not something I do a whole hell of a lot of... ANACHRONISM! Ah no, have forgotten to switch tape player on. Of course! It is the wheat germ cycle. Nothing more. Noting more, I note. Something akin to rambling ingenues playing with wambling engines. Later, my snoring has an overwhelming feel of melancholy. Where the sand came from, I cannot be certain. So many wasted words. I am too young for that. Well, age never really matters about that. I get very close to the stage, which is low and small in any case. Stuart dances like a maniac. Great start to a fantastic gig. I felt loved! Being loved is a great feeling, a bit like eating cheese. Woohoo! :-o Hi to all! I am doing a quick post to share something. Related to this, my stance on music is: I don't like things that suck. I've only managed to see them play out two and a half times before. All their songs sounded so good and so clear yet still ferocious and Wrarrrrr. It was much fun and she is everything you could hope for in a girl. Another day here another day in the house four walls, roof, floor, door. I'd love to get in on this :P. The song "There's Chu much love" was fab, though. Team Jedi aren't rocking my lace socks quite as much as they once did. But then I fell in love with someone else. It all happened on Sunday. I went with my old boy and his new girl on a little holiday. So if I were you, Mr. Chu, I would patent the Ken Chu trade mark. We are truly in a sad state if we need THIS much inspiration. // ee // +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: my longest post yet: missing children and the good lord below
by Bron 22 Apr '02

22 Apr '02

dear sinister my day so far has gone from normal to different events and perhaps all these events are truly mundane but for some beautiful reason my mind has likened to the habit of turning common events into romantic idealisms and destperate cries for help muffled in pure desire to survive in a shallow world of hello's and good-bye's. i woke up to the anticipated beeping of my alarm across the room, walked over to it and as i clicked the "off" switch i heard my lips whisper, "goddamn". i remembered as soon as i heard myself utter this word that i had just been to the candle-light service at church not even 12 hours before that. monday started and i was already a sinner...all at quarter to 7 in the morning. i showered in half-conciousness and threw on some clothes, my backpack, and jammed my headphones into my ears. as i started out on my 15-minute stroll to my 8 a.m. class, beth orton wailed something about how my eyes were cinnamon...it was just then that i opened my eyes for the first time and saw the gray sky lift all the green from the lawns on campus up in laud and honor. the sun wasn't shining at all, but the earth seemed to be aware of all the warmth that lied beneath it. i arrived at class on time, but the professor never showed. i felt like a third-grader again, as if it were a friday and it was my birthday and the clock had just struck 2:50 in the afternoon. when i realized the professor wasn't coming, i found it ironic how much more awake i became. my next class started an hour and a half later. i was to give a presentation with my group on computers and their history. if you're looking for a subject to present that sounds like it could be interesting but when you get down to it is one of the most mundane to hear about, talk about computers and their development. my focus was the 1960's and 1970's. the girl before me, speaking from 1945-1959, was simply dragging herself through her part of the presentation and as the class was trying to decide whether or not to even try to give a damn, i heard thoughts run back and forth in my head---like restless rowdy children---all of them laughing and screaming, "1959! quick! hurry! aw man, you're still talking about 1946! c'mon 1959!" and when she finally said, "then in 1959...", all the thoughts of my mischievous id yelled in unison, "Thank God for 1959!" and i lost it. i just burst out in laughter. loud and uncontrolled laughter. it took me a whole minute to apologize up and down and compose myself. i was next to present afterall. the laughter isn't completely my fault. it's who i am. when i was 7 years old i used to be sent out in the hallway at school for laughing in class---untamed laughter that came from nowhere-- -nothing was funny---but the punishment seemed even funnier. picture yourself walking down a long hallway of an elementary school in the mountains of north carolina---none of this inner- city shit---and at the end of the hall is this little girl sitting outside a closed doorway, laughing nonstop for 10 minutes. ...yeah...it's just who i am. so after my presentation in class i went to the union for a jalapeno cheese bagel and a cup of rasberry yogurt. i returned to my apartment and sat at my desk to begin brainstorming for my china research paper due this thursday. you don't have to be a genius to bullshit, but i've found that even this genius has procrastinated too long to reap what could have been some exceptional fruit. i think it's just another one of those lessons that i need to ponder and realize is a lesson to learn from before i find that i've become an irresponsible adult---or before i find that i've become an adult period. (is this still adolescence? am i still in the same category as a 12 year old even at age 21?) maybe. well, no. aw fuck if i know. proceeding... i called laura up and asked how her trip to boston went this weekend, how things went with the boy in boston. the conversation made me sleepy, at one point i even closed my eyes. she was sick with a stomach ache the whole time. her delirium was still at high tide and her voice traversed through the curly phone cord like a slowly restricting boa constrictor around my neck. my breathing slowed and her creeping voice lulled into a lullabye. i tried to respond as much as i could to reassure her i was still listening. she was telling me of rain and messes and naps and more messes and more rain. when she finished, i told her to have a good day. we hung up and i laid on my simple bed for a 20-minute cat-nap of dreams of sunnier days and all the vines my heart will swing from when my friend comes and visits me next week on his way to montana. not too much longer thereafter, i went to work, where i'm at now actually, and to my surprise i was sent to wash dishes. i went from professor's student aide to dishwasher. it was a switch i suppose. there had been a luncheon and somebody forgot the fact that paper plates are available at the local grocery store. oh well. we saved a tree...i think. after the dishes were washed i was allowed to go back to the usual---the dreaded---work i'm usually assigned. i made about a million copies with colored paper. the secretaries in the next room were speaking in low voices of aggravation and gossip about the higher-ups. they despised my presence just as they would have anybody's at the time but hey i was just doin my job, ladies. usually the copier machine is the Bitch of the Year---as i'm sure if any of you have ever done office work you know this is always the case. but this time around, i knew i had a million copies to make and knew that if anything fucked up i'd have to ask for assistance from the jealousy-ridden secretaries in the next room. so i took a deep breath in and exhaled quietly from partially separated lips. i put both hands on the machine and practiced zazen. over and over i repeated the thought, "be one with the machine..." i made sure that the machine took after me though, and that i did not blend into its qualities. the work was done beautifully and once again, zen saved the day. peace and love ---your mountain mama sweetheart X "The differences between what you hope for and what you end up receiving are part of what makes the outside, the hoped for, worthwhile...and beautiful." ---the Lovely Lou http://www.care2.com - Get your Free e-mail account that helps save Wildlife! +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: From Sneakers To Porn
by Vilkas . 22 Apr '02

22 Apr '02

SNEAKER (TRAINER) OBSESSION > SAMBAS ETC. > YAHOO GROUPS > PORN! Hello Kids. I am obsessed with sneakers. What else is as comfortable and as stylish? Nothing! My friend Anda and me were talking and we agreed that no matter what your shoes look like, the one thing that they must be is comfortable enough to either walk very far or run away from the bad guys very quickly if nessacary-i.e. functional-i.e.sneakers. I don't care for the white American sneakers; they're dorky and ugly. I'm the proud owner of fair number of pairs of sneakers, but my fave pair is the grass green neoprenette and suede Adidas skate sneakers with translucent lime green rubber stripes. They're so comfortable, they bounce, and they're bright. I am in love with European and Japanese market sneakers. The colours! The velcro! The inventive use of non-athletic fabrics! So. I've been on the hunt, sneaker pimpin' stylee for: 1. the bright Cereleun Blue Adidas Sambas/Gazelles 2. the pink, furry, Nike Kukini-B's 3. the flowered Puma Flows in any other colour but red I had found the Sambas/Gazelles at a charity shop on the famous Byres road, but they were too funnn-ky for even me. Sombody with stank-ass feet had owned these shoes. I passed on them. I wished I had snapped them up for £4.00. I could have boiled them or something. I saw this guy Thursday night wearing: lemon yellow Samba style suede Addidas with lemon yellow soles and tread! With cobalt blue stripes! They were beautiful. He was not...a wife-beater with BIG trousers combined with his sketchy demeanor makes him look like a dealer at a bad rave maaaaaaaan. But his sneakers were all that. One can only have so many pairs of shoes due to the combination of checking account and apartment size. I couldn't afford zillions of sneakers but I can still look. Online fashion magazines for sneakers are numerous. So; I looked up "Sneakers" on Yahoo groups. I got a few groups that were all about the same thing as me. And then maybe after the fourth group; there was a whole list of sneaker *fetish* sites. Yep. So of course I clicked on the one called "Lads Lust 4 Lads". It was a whole bunch of queer neds! Doin' it through the back door! Wearing shell suits and the like! Wearing puffy, bright white American style sneakers! Ned man-love! Woohoo! It was like the scary, racist, homophobic, delinquents from my neighborhood (Oregon Hill) decided to stop beating up non-whites and decided to start gettin' busy beating each others meat. I guess there are sneaker enthusiasts and sneaker fetishists. Me, I'm the former. Oh but I'm amused by the example of the latter. Go on wit yo (queer-ned-sneaker-wearing) bad self. As an aside; Isn't is odd how hardcore porn is so commonplace in this modern, space age America? It's another popular media form; like a sitcom or a fashion magazine. I'm not talking about that there are dirty magazines and vids; I mean that "Porn Star" is a clothing company, a general cultural reference, a sticker on the back of someone's hoopty, and a tv show theme on loads of tv shows. I don't have a problem with porn. Porn is, as Martha Stewart would say, is a good thing. Well, generally. I just have to ask what next? What will one find raunchy next? What happens when porn is no longer dirty? In the US, I suspect either a healthy repesct for and comfort with the human body or the complete opposite, essentially legal rape, would happen. Beware of desensitisation; it can lead to brain dulling. As an aside to that, I'm just glad to have connected Martha Stewart to porn. And as an aside to that aside; there's this guy I know called Cornell. Me and my friend Holly were spazzing out one night in our local; thinking up crazy-ass names for each other and folks we knew; Holly came up with the best one ever: Softcore Cor-nell-ography. Well at least it makes me laugh. Summary: Ok. I love sneakers cos they're fly and comfortable at the same time; you can bounce and look good at the same time. And I'm glad to see a place where neds and other such young men can learn to truly love each other. Rock On, Ms. Vilkas _________________________________________________________________ Join the worlds largest e-mail service with MSN Hotmail. http://www.hotmail.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: All I need is a pretty song
by Matthew Henderson 22 Apr '02

22 Apr '02

Certain things in life bother me. In fact, a lot of things in life bother me. Of course, this happens to everyone. I was talking with my girlfriend the other day about music. She said she used to rely on music to make her happy, but now she relies more on the interaction between her and other people. This is a good thing, I suppose. The debate about the meaning of music and how important it is has raged on and on for years. But it will never be solved. I knew this when I was talking about it. I knew it before, and I still know it now. I just hate the fact that things can't be solved. I realized it a long time ago, the sort of disillusionment of youth that happens to most everyone who thinks about it enough. It was at this point I turned to art and entertainment to make me feel better. Sort of shallow things perhaps, but why not? Politics is annoying in this way. All the fighting for equal rights, liberalism, conservatism, socialism, all of this seems worthless. It will never work out. We're only human, and as long as a human can do it, he/she will fuck someone over. It's the way we are. In this respect, a perfect government will never work. There are some better than others, but even in the better ones, there are too many problems. They'll never be fixed, so why get angry about it? Why try to change it? It seems useless. However, if everyone thinks in this way, nobody will try to change things anymore. And big changes have occured, but everything seems so pointless to even try anymore. America is so steeped in conservatism, and with all these outside elements (terrorism, etc...), it's going to be even harder to change. It's awfully depressing. This is the old idealist vs. realist thing. I find it harder and harder to be an idealist these days. Same goes for love, which you indie sentimental folk love to talk about. It's all sort of worthless too. How often do relationships really work out? How giving can one person be for so long? You know that someone is going to get tired, and things will fuck up, and there will be bad patches. And eventually, it will end. Marriages that last awhile seem to be rare, and when they do happen, it's usually at the expense of true happiness or dignity on someone's part or something like that. I know that's vague, but whatever. My cyberpunk class this year has bugged me in the same fashion. We read these articles on the ethics of lawnmower man and the feminisation of the male body in Total Recall. But why? What's the point? Why does this matter? What are we learning about? Are we learning about ourselves? I dont' think so. Lawnmower Man and Total Recall are both shitty movies in my opinion. Criticism can be constructive if it points out problems and plusses that will help the filmaker, or the viewer decide if it's worth watching. But detailed shit like that just doesn't make sense. It doesn't make the meaning any greater for me. Oh, so the 13th floor and the Matrix both involve Buidriad's 4 levels of simulation. So? Why is this pertinent to anybody or anything? I took the midterm in there, which was two essays. I thumbed through the articles, making up bullshit that sounded good for the essay. I got tired of it, just stopped, turned it in, and left. I got a 19.5 out of 20. How is this possible? I didn't believe in any of it, yet I still got a good grade. It's bullshit. I don't know. This is why music is important to me. It gets me away. It makes me stop thinking of all this senseless shit that nobody will ever figure out. What makes us human, if there is a God, etc... It's all useless. I'm tired of fighting it. I just want to escape. I'll just go put on "Summer Wasting" and feel a lot better. Sorry if this was long and stupid. I haven't really read over it. Or proofread, or revised my thoughts. It's just an on the fly rant. Feel free to email me and bitch about it, I know I deserve it. -Matt _________________________________________________________________ Chat with friends online, try MSN Messenger: http://messenger.msn.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: this thursday
by Ian Watson 22 Apr '02

22 Apr '02

Hello all! Just another reminder that this Thursday is the first night of How Does It Feel To Be Loved? in London. Please support us in our hour of need. We'll be playing loads of stuff from "Storytelling", so if you want to hear it in a club come along! Those details once again... Club name: How Does It Feel To Be Loved? When: April 25th, Buffalo Bars, underneath The Famous Cock pub, outside Highbury & Islington tube 9pm-2am, beer £1.50 until midnight, £3 adm Music played: The Smiths * The Supremes * The Go-Betweens * Dusty Springfield * Belle & Sebastian * Tammi Terrell * Aztec Camera * The Ronettes * Orange Juice * Beach Boys * The Temptations * Velvet Underground * Felt * The Shangri-Las * Primal Scream * Otis Redding * The Field Mice * Magnetic Fields * Dexys Midnight Runners * The Four Tops * Dolly Parton * The Orchids * Simon And Garfunkel Website address: http://www.howdoesitfeel.co.uk See you Thursday! x +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Mr. Savage!
by Fernando Brito 21 Apr '02

21 Apr '02

Every time I start reading a book the first thing I do is open its last page and read its last phrase. Of course it never makes any sense. But I think it's inciting, like a skein, I have one end in my hand but I can only get to the other one if I am dedicated enough to uncoil it! One day I got this book, which I admit I stole from my school's library, and there was the most intriguing last phrase I've ever read: "Slowly, very slowly, like two unhurried compass needles, the feet turned towards the right; north, north-east, east, south-east, south, south-south-west; then paused, and, after a few seconds, turned as unhurriedly back towards the left. South-south-west, south, south-east, east." Reading Ken's last post reminded me that book... Ken's self explanation (and you, sinister witnesses, would better save it, for one day it will be like the Dead Sea Scrolls, and your grandchildren will thank you for the fortune they got by selling it to the Natural Sciences Museum or whatever it's called where you live, and move your bones to a better grave!) shows that this whole situation is so out of his control that, (un)fortunately, there's nothing else he can do. Unless he gets as desperate as Mr. John "Savage" and take an extreme attitude, what would surely soothe his suffering, but also spread the cult even more, to a point where the current Roman Empire will have to step in and chase his followers like the Sinister Mailing List was called Al Qaeda! So if I were you, Mr. Chu, I would patent the Ken Chu trade mark. You might not get millionaire (what I resolutely doubt), but your children or grandchildren certainly will. And if this list had, legaly speaking, the same authority it has regarding to emotional affairs, I would like to declare that I am not writing this with the hidden intention of, in the near future, when you are rich, suing you for not paying me for this idea I am now giving you. It's purely a friendly gesture, from sinister to sinister. And please don't think my Brave New World quote is some kind of advice or anything! In our miserable old world there's still a lot of places where you could hide. Remember Ronnie Biggs?! Yesterday I had my first Dogma 95 experience (caramba! 7 years, it was more than time!), the lovely danish film "Italian for Beginners". I really like romantic comedies, like this one, or like those with Meg Ryan! I like any non typical american movie, those in which there's always the good and the bad ones. I like when everyone is good, and everything is joyful and everyone is happy in spite of their troubles... Alas! I like twee movies! The previous twee movie I saw was Amelie Poulin, a very good movie as well! Up to now I'm still trying to find and buy a red All Star (if you saw the movie you'll understand, if you didn't you're a fool), and believe me, I can't find a red All Star sized 42 (brazilian standard) in this huge city I live! They always tell me the same: "They only bring one pair of that size each time they come". It's been so long since I started my search that the last time I've been to a store I had no choice but to buy an Adidas... but I'm not giving up, I WANT MY RED ALL STAR!!! I would ask someone to help me and buy the sneakers, here it costs about 12 dollars or 15 euros, is it cheap? Anyway, I can't give you my address... I'm moving!! Possibly next week! My roomie asked me to leave! Not really, actually it's been a couple of months since I told him I was thinking about moving to somewhere else, and he asked me some time to find someone to replace me. Last week he found my substitute, and she (the substitute) has to move as soon as possible, so now I have to hurry and find another flat. In fact I've already found it, a good one, only three blocks from work, with an extra room where I I'll put my drums, when I buy it! I'm just waiting for my new roomie to see and aprove it, but he is kardecist and every weekend he has to go to his parents town and take part in his religion rituals, which involve the incorporation of spirits by some people called mediums. Anyway, he will only see the new flat next week, and I hope it's still available if he aprove it. Once more I'm leaving... I was born and lived in a tiny town until I was 18, but since then I've never been more than 3 years in the same place. And here I go again... Bad news... I'm not going to see Charlatans next Monday. I'm working on that night... could they have chosen a worse day for a gig?! I hope I can see Stephen Malkmus, I have a pair of tickets and I hope I'll find a way to go to both gigs, but I'm not so sure, as I have this damn project to finish, which was supposed to be delivered last Thursday, but now I have no idea when we'll finish it. I think I'd better stop making plans for a while. This past week was kinda like an Ally McBeal episode in my work place. There was a huge leak in the girls' toilets and we had to share the boys' restroom with the girls. Not that great, girls and boys together were not allowed, the only difference was that we had to lift the toilets' covers to use them! More about working... last week I put an adhesive stamp with the IYFS cover on my computer at work. It's weird how people's reaction is almost the same. Everyone that sees it says more or less the same: "Belle and Sebastian?". I stare at them, waiting for some opinion, or any reaction, but that's all, they just say "Belle and Sebastian?", and keep doing what they were doing. I don't know if they don't want to say anything to avoid a conflict of opinions, or if they'd like to say something like "this band is great, I love'em!" but they're afraid I'll tell someone else that they're a B&S fan! Kisses & hugs, Fernando Brito +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: smallest post ever
by Dean Gillon 21 Apr '02

21 Apr '02

Hi, read a description of B&S today that said "they're like air escaping from a bouncy castle". what does this mean? Dean XX __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Everything you'll ever need on one web page from News and Sport to Email and Music Charts http://uk.my.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: don't forget the flowers
by Kirsten Kenyon 21 Apr '02

21 Apr '02

it doesn't seem to me that a person who doesn't want attention should dress like a clown and drive around in a yellow volkswagon with "PINGO" vanity plates. in a fit of silliness, i waved gleefully and made a gruesome face, expecting pingo to wave back, and maybe squirt water from the flower pinned to her lapel. instead, she scowled at me, mouthed something, then floored it and cut me off, narrowly missing my fender. there's nothing funny about road rage. it was sort of like the time that amish guy gave me the bird out the window of his buggy. it just seemed to throw everything off, somehow. nothing much happens around here. i sit for hours in booth twenty nine. sometimes i take part in The Greasy Spoon Jeopardy Challenge, which might sound mildly exciting but is really nothing more than a couple of weathered old roofers, a middle-aged fry cook, and yours truly, sitting around a formica-topped table and shouting out questions (answers). you know how it goes. the cook tells me i'm his best customer. "ya know," he mutters through a cloud of smoke, "ya really are. all these old farts gotta have everything just so. but not you." this is untrue, as i certainly do have to have things just so. it's just an easy sort of "so." black coffee (no need for a spoon) and ice water, which i never actually drink but always order anyway. "see that one over there?" he gestures somewhat discreetly with his sooty thumb. "that's lorraine. she's gotta have Egg Beaters and diabetic syrup, half decaf and half regular, and no ice in her water. extra napkins. if you fuck it up, you hear about it." i look at lorraine. she looks like she's been rolled in flour. there is a smear of matte red revlon where her lips used to be, and her feet look like two fat yams shoved into moonboots. she's attacking her scrambled Egg Beaters as if she has to hurry and eat them before they start eating her. it's easy to tell that she learned to smoke through careful observation of glamorous old movie stars. she looks sort of beautiful that way, perched there on the little chrome stool like an orange balancing precariously on a spool of thread. is it worse to be a depressed clown or a mime with something really important to say? also, i was wondering...when the first identical twins were born, what did people think? when TWO of them came out, and they looked exactly the same? and what can you make of a powdery old woman who wears moonboots and has a crepey neck and watery eyes and still manages to remind you of audrey hepburn? (assume that you love audrey hepburn.) and finally, a question that has puzzled me since fourth grade, when i read it in a paperback joke book that i hid under my bed so that my mom wouldn't know i'd spent my book club money on a joke book instead of on something like 'anne of green gables' or 'five little peppers and how they grew' or another selection that didn't have a drawing of a guy with his finger up his nose on the front cover: if a tree falls in the forest and crushes a mime, and nobody's around to hear it, does anyone care? love kirsten http://www.care2.com - Get your Free e-mail account that helps save Wildlife! +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: Life is getting smaller but love is growing bigger
by Belle The Confused Dog 20 Apr '02

20 Apr '02

It is very strange but I think things are getting smaller these days. The whole house is shrinking, the garden and even the girl. The table is so much shorter. When the girl used to put things onto it I couldn't see them at all. Now it is so much easier. And if I really try I can sometimes even take them from the table. I don't try too often because it makes the girl quite angry and that makes me quite sad. That isn't the only thing that is strange. Lately I have been thinking about love. Love is very strange. Recently, the girl with the chocolates who normally lives with my Ali came to stay again.! It was so great except for the fact that she didn't bring any photos of my Ali or chocolate this time. In case you didn't know Ali is the love of my life. Except I haven't in even met him. Well I was in love with him that is. But then I fell in love with someone else. It all happened on Sunday. Some people came to see me and the girl and the other girl. One of them was the boy who used to live here, and another girl, and one of them was a person I have met before and often licked, and finally there was the boy, another boy, who although I had seen before didn't remember. I think I had definitely seen him before because he said "nice to see you again belle" and the girl said I had seen him once before and she doesn't usually lie to me. At least not often. Sometimes she pretends to have something in her hand so I will come and talk to her. She Says "what is it belle? what is it?" And I go to try to guess. Then she laughs at me and says "nothing you fool!" Its not very funny if you ask me. This time I don't think she was lying though, because I think I met this boy when I was young, too young to fall in love. Now I'm older I saw him a whole new light and wanted to kiss him all of the time. That afternoon we watched the video of the boy who the girl is in love with. He is also in the band that makes me a little bit famous. The girl hasn't even met him really. Its sort of like I used to be with Ali. When she is older she will understand that she isn't really in love with him even if he is very handsome. The girl and the girl who didn't have the chocolates swooned ever so slightly at the video. I ran around and tried to get the attention of the boy I had met before but didn't remember. Later on he played the guitar and sang it wasn't even scary like when the girl does it. I swooned ever so slightly. The next day I went with my old boy and his new girl on a little holiday. There I met Hamish. A small dog but very handsome. I looked into to his eyes. He wagged his tail. That's when I discovered true love! Love is, indeed, very strange. Love and Kisses, Belle xx _________________________________________________________________ MSN Photos is the easiest way to share and print your photos: http://photos.msn.com/support/worldwide.aspx +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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Sinister: no more rhymes now i mean it!
by Miss Marianna Longmire 20 Apr '02

20 Apr '02

Anybody wanna peanut? Sweet, sweet Andre the Giant. Who is, incidentally, running around the corrirors of the Middlesex Hospital in London. Walking down Tottenham Court Road after work yesterday, I saw an elderly man cycling along one of those marvellous old push bikes. He was wearing a tweed jacket complete with leather patches on the elbows and, most pleasantly, he had a spinning carnival flower on the handlebars that was spinning in the breeze. It was the most beautiful sight I had seen all day and it made me smile. As did those lovely chaps from Sodastream who were recently playing in London. I saw them once, despite being at all three gigs. Damn those alcoholic beverages. So yeas, Sodastream. Were. good. Great in fact. It had been such a long time since I saw them last; I was filled with a strange sense of surrealism as Karl's voice transported me back to Perth. Standing there in the Spitz, I thought I was in the cosy surrounds of the Grosvenor front room with my chums of old, marvelling at the band's brilliance and discussing whether or not Perth had the greatest local bands in the country. The consensus? Yes. Now however, Jebediah, Red Jezebel and Team Jedi aren't rocking my lace socks quite as much as they once did. Bless. Sodastream, on the other hand, inspire me to get all giggly and chat to them drunkenly after the show. Apologies. About a month ago, I moved into a new abode. I like it. Lots. I like the fact there is a chap who lives upstairs and blasts music out of his windows every weekend from 8 in the morning. And surprisingly it's not irritating. Well, not yet. You see, it's an odd assortment of music from '60s soul to S Club &. A few weeks ago on a spectacularly warm Sunday morning, I was walking along the road towards my house and Percy Sledge was his artist of choice. The rays of the sun were streaming down on the footpath and the kids were out palying in the streets - the boys were having a kick about, the girls jumping rope as their braids bounced about. It was a strange moment of joy and for the first time, I felt like London was home. My mood however soon soured as he began playing Annie Lennox. Curses. Faith has been restored though, as the other week saw him playing a collection of Destiny's Child's greatest hits - Jumpin' Jumpin', Survivor, Nasty Girl, Say My Name etc. Bootietastic. There was some talk a while ago about Spearmint. They're playing again on Monday at the Borderline in London. With Saloon. Yay! Spearmint are grand, adn Shirely has a sexellent array of stripey jumpers. Mmm. xx Marianna Ooh, I forgt to mention that Mao is THE GREATEST CARD GAME EVER! _________________________________________________________________ Join the worlds largest e-mail service with MSN Hotmail. http://www.hotmail.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister(a)missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo(a)missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+

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