Dearest Beloved, I've been out of circulation for a bit. What can I say? I've been busy busy, adjusting to this new life of mine. Keen viewers will be delighted to hear that Wumpkinny has got herself a job. A job in the glitzy world of Showbiz, no less. So that's good. Anyway.... Frankko said:
- -All swedish girls are easy. Have no idea about that one, but I doubt it. Been to those Helsinki-Stockholm-Helsinki cruises (48 hours or partying) quite often, so I should know, though.
Ah, the Helsinki-Stockholm ferry. Such memories. Actually, no memory at all. I was warned before I travelled that it would be wise to shut myself away in my cabin after the first hour, because these Vikings like to drink, especially in International Waters. Unfortunately, In my cabin was a 900 year old American who was explaining how exactly much he hated Finland, to a Finn with a humungous moustache (which covers 45% of the population, I guess). After a while, the American left, at which point the Finn turned to me and said "Good. The stupid Yankee has gone. We must drink wodka now", and poured me a pint of Finlandia. And another....and another. We became firm friends, despite me knowing half a dozen words of Finnish, all of them filthy, and him having learned English from John Wayne. Sadly, he decided to go ballroom dancing on the upper deck leaving me to wander the ferry making a complete and utter arse of myself in front of several hundred bemused passengers. Genevieve said:
i still have a strange suspicion i`m not hearing the REAL bowlie facts.
You certainly haven't. All these earnest recollections of picnics and football matches and there hasn't been the vaguest inkling of the glorious debauchery and sordid antics of various Sinisterines (other than a few allusions to Sting's magic tantric wanking theramin). You want to know EXACTLY what Chris Leonard and Nick Dastoor will do for a pound. You want to know what Rachel asked my ex-flatmate to do to her. You want to know the identity of the part-man, part-horse creature loitering round the gents, and asking shagging couples if he could watch. You want to about the wanton exhibitionsim in the adventure playground behind the T-shirt stall. But I'm not going to tell you. It's your own fault for not going. I can, however, tell you that I got my photo in Melody Maker, which somehow makes me feel closer to Tim "Pinteresque" Hopkins. And here, in time honoured fashion, and in no particular order, is my Bowlie moments top ten: 1 The first Roolz show, an impromptu affair featuring just me and Joss, in front of an audience of two. Imagine what we can with a few rehearsals. 2 The funk soul rabbit. 3 "It's a big pile of chocolate arse" - Keith "Barry Norman" Watson on Willy Wonka. 4 Tim Hopkins telling me exactly what Exeter fans shouted at Hartlepool. 5 "The Horn" 6 Keith's Frank Spencer impression, which sounds uncannily like Roland Rat Superstar. 7 Several spontaneous Cockney knees-ups, all featuring a medley of "Turtle Power", "Parklife" and the theme from "Auf Wiedersehen, Pet" 8 Trousers asking me in an archly post-modern fashion for "More than a feeling" at the Betsy Trotwood, little knowing I'd already cued it up, but dancing like a rockbeast anyway. 9 Warrander John cooking his tea dressed as a gorilla. 10 Wumpkinny's face throughout Belle and Sebastian's set, worth the admission price alone. It's been emotional. Tag xx +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the reborn Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail "sinister@majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo@majordomo.net". WWW: http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+