Hi kidlets, Should any of you be wondering, wearing green suede shoes and beige corduroys during a MONSOON surely spells disaster. Yes, I now have green trimmed pants that are 4 times as long as they used to be. Who knew they held so much water? I don't really mind as I do happen to like rain (yes, I'm not normal) but as I was patiently waiting at the bus stop, some little punky kid comes up and says: "Hey Bitch! Don't you know your pants are turning green?" I felt like responding: "Hey bastard, don't you know you're singlehandedly destroying the English language?" But I didn't. Because I'm a nice person. And generally aloof. And I like to start sentences with conjunctions. Just call me little Miss Atwood. Speaking of punky kids though, is it just me or are people getting shorter? I swear to God there are so many tiny people yet they all seem to be the mean, mal-adjusted kids. Maybe they just stand out more because they're so BASTARDY, or maybe there are just more bastards out there. Please don't think that I attribute small stature to mean people, or vice versa, as I know there are many short and nice people, and tall and mean ones. One really cannot deny the fact, though, that no one is as tall as they used to be (except my corduroys, of course - they've far exceeded any height restrictions). I just had to get that innane little anecdote out of the way. I was really writing to explain a problem I have. Am I the only one in the world who finds the Smiths' "Some Girls Are Bigger THan Others" to be sheer hilarity? I laugh out loud everytime I hear this song. The part where Antony says to Cleopatra: "Ooh, I say...." simply KILLS ME! I thought everyone would feel this way, but I played it to a friend (who is usually quite open to said band) and she just looked at me funny. "I don't get it," she said. Here's the crux of the issue: I don't get it either. I cannot for the life of me explain why this is so funny. Why I am catapulted into the throes of such passion upon hearing those words is beyond me. I haven't felt this confused since they tried to teach me fractions. Do any of you understand? My only explanation is that I'm a frighteningly boring person. I mean, really boring. I actually listen to the CBC - voluntarily. In fact, none of you are reading this right now because you've all fallen into a deep pit of sleep. Speaking of understanding, can any of the Quebec sinisterians (I know you're out there) please explain to me that show 'La Fureur'? I don't get it. Actually, I get enough of it to care about what I don't understand. For instance, why is everyone on the show so goooooood looooookin'? Do they not let ugly, unfashionable people on, or is Quebec simply a hotbed for the pretty and fashionable? (My money's riding on the former.........). Lastly, what's with that part where they all start singing together and the music cuts out and one person is left to sing? They always have such pained looks on their faces, then everyone cheers when they're done as if they've cured cancer. It's not that hard to read lyrics off a screen, is it? Finally, are there any Max Jacob scholars out there? If so, please let me know. I have some questions for you. (hmmmm....ominous!) yours, drowsily, Marybethhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh P.S. Sorry for my incorrect and grammatically culpable use of they, etc. when I should use he/she, etc. I'm just too lazy to fix it. I'm sorry. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+