TOO MUCH CHEESECAKE TOO SOON The week started badly. An attempt to force myself into my suit trousers (bought 3 years ago) ended in aching arms, a near hernia and ruptured kidneys. Oh! To be that beautiful thin indie boy again. But then I wouldn't have enjoyed all that beer and those pies. Lose weight or shell out for a new suit? Not sure which would be the least painful. OLD MONEY'S BETTER THAN NEW? They never made a wedding list. The invitation said 'we'd rather have your presence than your presents'. My mum mentioned they were going for a city break on the continent as a honeymoon so I shoved some Euros inside the card. For those of you living outside the UK, the Euro's been in the news a bit here lately due to the 'No!' campaign commissioning a deeply offensive advert comparing the single currency to the 3rd Reich. Tossers. A country's worth is measured by its culture, achievements and its contribution to the international community - not who's picture it puts on the money. The Euro is BLUDDY GRATE anyway - I'd love to be able to bugger off to France and not have to change any money. NO MENTION IN THE LATEST TRIBUNE Loudly cursing all taxis, I arrived at the reception late. The groom hadn't seen me for about ten years and barely recognised me with my beard and trendy cropped hair. She looked fetching in her waistcoat and silk tie. Back in 'the day', she was 'my cousin Lisa' - about the only relative with whom I could have deep & lengthy arguments on religion and science. In our time we've believed in both. Now we're both grown up and she was celebrating her commitment with Judy (Lisa & Judy - the recurring B&S girl's names to give this post some pretence of relevance). Along with a hundred or so friends and relatives who understood perfectly well that here were two people who were truly in love - and that was well worth celebrating with cheezy 70s/80s music. The ceremony had gone swimmingly. The celebrant had spoken movingly about how mutually shared love was real & good whether or not it was recognised by religion or law. At the reception I was saddened to think of the number of people I had heard of (and sometimes known personally) who opposed that viewpoint. People who truly believe that this kind of love was 'wrong', 'sinful' or 'immoral'. Bollocks to them - they're just idiots. The two people who twirled in each other's arms while various kids chased each other around during the First Dance were the only two people in the world - joyously in love for their families and friends to see. Nothing could possibly be wrong about that. AND DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU: Dancing with your mum to Robbie Williams. Robster __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Everything you'll ever need on one web page from News and Sport to Email and Music Charts http://uk.my.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+