I am a bad boy. Or a "bad person", if I'm being non-sexist, or Liz Daplyn. But unfortunately I'm neither of those. Yeah, so I tried to send this e-mail earlier on, from my work address, and it didn't let me, and told me that my e-mail contains "Pornographic Contents"! And I read it, and it said that my e-mail was pornographic because it had the word "fucking" in it. Fucking hell. So I guess now I'm just going to talk about actual porn instead, if I'm going to be accused of something I may as well be actually guilty! People get angry with me a lot like that, just the other night I went back home to my flat, and my flatmate left me a message asking me that "If you want to cook at 1 in the morning can you please be quiet?" I wasn't even hungry. But then I sent him a message back (a pretty grumpy one, actually) about some other things and things got a little hot, and so we took off all our clothes, and made some sweet loving all night. And afterwards we were friends again. I guess I can Thank Fuck For That. That didn't actually happen, by the way, well the hate messages did, but not the fucking. Thank fuck. I did actually watch some porn though that night, it was "Debbie Does Dallas", apparently a classic, a porno with an alliterating name is hard to beat. I bet Mark Casarotto can though, in 60 seconds. Fucking hell. The movie was sexcellent, it was about college cheerleaders having to go to Dallas for some reason but didn't have the funds, and so all went and got themselves part-time jobs. Not BLOW jobs, mind, not yet, they came later, and the girls liked it. However, they were all good girls who never go all the way. Except Debbie, whom Mr Greenfeld, on the promise of paying for the Dallas trip for the whole cheerleading band, fucked the pants out of, or he would have, had she been wearing any. Thank fuck for that. I think if I say Thank Fuck anymore I might turn into Chris Evans, and that'd be bad, with him being an anagram of "no bend" and all. Fucking Hell. Ken _________________________________________________________________ Get a speedy connection with MSN Broadband. Join now! http://resourcecenter.msn.com/access/plans/freeactivation.asp +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+