Good evening After a crisis meeting with my bank manager on Thursday, I stepped onto the escalator that leads from my bank manager's ivory tower to the sodden streets of this fair city. As I glided down the staircase (1), my oblong bag swinging like a briefcase by my side, I felt like a proper man. If I was asked when I was twelve what I would be doing when I was grown up this would be it, and there I was doing it. I felt like I was a real person, who could be in a book called "Robin Makes Waves" or "The Not-So Mundane Life of Mister Stout". I stood up tall, and braced myself for an afternoon of conferences and crisis-meetings. Then I remembered that I'd only been to see my bank manager because I was broke and aimless, and walked home to watch Fifteen-to-One. A funny thing to do when watching Fifteen-to-One is to name all the people after how they look, so a bald person would be Mister Bald, and a scared old man would be called Mister Trembler. Usually, whenever I do this the winner is Mister Beard. On Thursday evening, I went to see "Belle and Sebastian" DJing here in Nottingham. Of course Belle and Sebastian turned out to be Chris and Richard. After being let in an hour late, we realised that Chris had in fact been replaced by a fat man with breasts, so "Belle and Sebastian" were in fact "Fat Man and Richard". It was a good nite, though. I got hungry just before they finished so I ran out to the chip shop and bought a box of chips. As I waited outside for my friends, eating my chips, and the bouncers stole half of them ("Oooh, vinegar, that's great. I love vinegar - it kills the grease"), I spoke to the girl on the door. "Don't you think it's a bit crap billing one person as 'Belle and Sebastian?' I think some people were a bit disappointed" "I suppose. I don't think we could fit in the whole band, though. There's thirteen of them." "Oh" "Hey mate, can I have another chip?" "If you want" So in one night Belle and Sebastian went from having seven members, to two , to one and then to thirteen. I was very confused. Let's be honest, I'd have been in bed already if if wasn't for those dreams about obstacle courses. Well that was last Thursday. Since then I've been economising due do the wise words and steely gaze of the bank manager, and just staying in and working (2). If anyone has any ideas for fun things I could do without spending any money, I'd like to know. At home at the weekend my mum tried to fill me up with dumplings so I wouldn't have to eat for a week, but it doesn't work. Tonight, though, a certain someone will be cooking a meal for the two of us, and we can do inexpensive things all evening. In the end you know, all the best things are free. bye then Robin xxx (1) Important Safety Information: http://www.eesf.org/ (2) My Life's Work: http://www.nottingham.ac.uk/~ppyragg/ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+