Kate Mulloy wrote:
Velocity!- I meant to compliment you on your most wonderful village...can I play a part as well?...Do you have someone to run the health food store? I can be the resident tree-hugger as well if you wish...think of it!...to spend a summer wasting; selling granola, wearing Berkies, and hugging maples...Belle/Sebastian-- are you reading this now?
Love in 12pt font, Katie
Dear Miss Katie: Thank you for your application for employment with Rabbit Brand (tm). Regrettably I must inform you that we are currently not seeking anyone with your qualifications at this time. While we are looking for persons in our rabbit care operations, we do not feel that a person of your qualifications would be comfortable in that type of work. We would like to inform you that while we cannot offer you a position, we are a very environmentally friendly company and we felt that a person with your qualifications might be of interest to our parent corporation the firm Bear, Bear, Bear, & Nephew, & Son. We have therefore taken the liberty of forwarding your application and résumé to our parent corporation and they have indicated to us that they will contact you directly. Thank you for considering Rabbit Brand (tm) Sincerely Rabbit Brand (tm) Board of Management. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- BEAR, BEAR, BEAR, & NEPHEW, & SON London - Paris - New York - Tokyo - Toronto Global Headquarters: Sinister Village Dear Miss Katie: Recently we received a copy of your application for employment and your résumé from our subsidiary company Rabbit Brand (tm). We are quite impressed with your qualifications and would like to offer you employment with the firm Bear, Bear, Bear, & Nephew, & Son in the capacity of president of one of our newly developed subsidiaries, Nuts and Berries Brand (tm). We would also like to offer you the Chair on the Board of Directors for Nuts and Berries Brand (tm). We offer you a very competitive package along with the normal benefits for Directors of the firm, including free rabbit service. Nuts and Berries Brand (tm) is a very young company and its growth potential will be yours to exploit. Our goal is to provide a wide selection of health foods including many varieties of gourmet nuts and berries. We are hoping to expand into the packaged foods market. You will be entirely responsible for the advertising campaigns targeted to all species as we attempt to expand into diverse markets. We are also looking into possibilities of producing our own maple pure syrup from maple forests recently acquired in an undisclosed location. Should you accept this position, you will immediately dive into an interesting project as Nuts and Berries Brand (tm) has secured the contract to cater the upcoming royal wedding between Queen Velocity Farewell and Prince Percival III. We are also seeking royal warrants so that we may place By Royal Appointment stickers on everything we sell. Thank you for your consideration, Sincerely Bear, Bear, Bear, & Nephew, & Son.. +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+