Hello chums, 44-24-40 Nice statistics, I think. Don't you? First of all the swearing competition. One or two people have mailed me ask for clarification on what exactly the rules are, which suggests that I succeeded in making my rules the very spitting image of inside-the-top-of-a-boardgame obfuscation. OK, here's a digested version: 1. Make me laugh 2. Send me words which would work as swearwords (for example "Micking Hell" might well work as an expletive to be used if you had dropped an anvil on your foot, wheras "There's a wovewy fwuffy wabbit" probably wouldn't.) Make them Belle and Sebastian related if you can. 3. That's it. We have had some entries, but at the same time, Honey isn't exactly drowning in them. A cesspool of his own making, perhaps, a lake of naughty sinister words, no. Remember that the prize is a glorious copy of Stuart David's latest work of fictive genius. There have apparently been BIG FIGHTS on the streets of Phuket, Thailand over ownership of this book. Oh, and I have prevailed upon Paul to pull some additional copies from his magic Honey Pants, so you have a good chance of being a winner. Everyone knows what makes me laugh. It's easy. Think *puerile*. So come on Sinister kids, let's get dirty! Um, sorry. A couple of other observations from the past few days: Martin saw fit to ask us all:
"Aren't gassy men a pain?"
Yes we are, but that fine Bass beer from Burton has that effect on some of us. Sorry. It could be worse, it could be Bass beer from Burton and rough cider from Sidford, Devon, which gives a far more substantial form of offence. Substantial if not solid, if you see what I mean. Gassy women are similarly unpleasant, I find. Gassy dogs are even worse, especially when they are just old and have lost interest in long walks or litter trays. Gassy children, however, are fun for all the family, at the dining table or in front of 'Last of the Summer Wine' on a Sunday evening. Oooh I can hear Granny cackling even now. I cried and cried when Doctor Whatson broke his silence...
We ... myself ... Mick Cooke... at the 13th note Cafe ... King of Glasgow ... rip the "kids" off ... we'll get a taxi back home ... Anyone's welcome to come along and pay, please do.
It's a sad thing. I've seen it happen before. Look:
sorry I haven't posted to the list for bloody ages, things used to be really relaxed in attitude at work, but they're not now I'm afraid to say and I can't really post from work.
This translates as "I've started hanging around with the band and I'm too important, famous and just all-round good to waste my time posting to you lot now. Oh, and by the way, I'm laughing up my sleeve at all the half-understood gossip I read here. I know the truth, of course, but I'm not telling you plebs. And I saw Stuart Murdoch's pizzle when he was taking a Jimmy Jago. So I know exactly how big it is. But I'm not telling you that either." Come back to us, Keith. We still love you. We miss you. I promise I won't laugh at you when you stick up for pathetically bad 1970s World Health Organisation records. I promise I won't conjure a mental picture of you as Graham Bonnet singing 'Since You've Been Gone' with reflective shades framed by a classic Scottish indiepop bowlcut. Tempting though it may be. Mark wrote:
paunchy townies and their barrel-shaped, slightly soiled wives (*vast cultural stereotype ahoy, but it's largely true, honest*)
I'm having to assume that this was a piece of biting satire on those listies who persist in referring to townies and pikeys and the like. Because I can't think of another reason why someone as pleasant as Mark would come out with such a nasty-sounding piece of snobbery. Nice satire, Mark! I couldn't answer any of the questions on University Challenge this week, but I swept the board on 'Scrapheap Challenge' and also did very well on 'Watercolour Challenge'. Har. Well, I guess that's all from me for today. Michele was right, you know, the Scala on Saturday is definitely the place to be. See you at the bar. Cheers Tim ===== __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Bid and sell for free at http://auctions.yahoo.com +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the reborn Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail "sinister@majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo@majordomo.net". WWW: http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "jelly-filled danishes" +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+