*** Such sallies and swoons. A starling flock. A total eclipse of the moon. Paul Muldoon *** So anyway, as I was blearily sitting down to tea and toast earlier, I glanced up from my kitchen-table concentration on buttering and lemon-curding and out the window to notice that there was an elegant young lady mallard perching on the garden fence, her tail feathers spread for balance on the thin wooden support. She seemed rather agitated, not to mention out of place in a small garden entirely surrounded by tall houses, but it wasn't until a couple of minutes later that I noticed her full complement of onetwothreefourfivesixSEVEN baby ducklings clustered round a sizeable flowerpot on the ground below. The nice man next door and I came to the conclusion that she probably sneakily laid her eggs in someone's back garden, hatched them out and is now wondering how to get them to the park pond. The nice man is phoning the appropriate people and they should all be happier by the time I get back home. Hopefully. Crikey. On to less important things: SUMMER HERE KIDS! Nice to see that Edwyn Collins will be getting a heap of royalties from the use of "Never Met a Girl Like You Before" on some hair dye advert. That'll keep him in Hawaiian shirts for a while yet. The inexplicable bruises (right side of the body only for some reason) of the last week's fun and games fading, like the morning, into green and gold, it's time for reflection, along with a load of other irrelevancies. What else is a jobless girl to do on a lovely sunny London day? DANCING "How Does It Feel To Be Loved?" was the question, and I'm not sure I can remember the answer, but we (having nailed our courage to the sticking point) danced our socks off anyway, despite most of the fab records being at least twice the average age. I think. The Buffalo Bars (what macho people have on the front of their Sports Futility Vehicles to fend off the large ruminative wildlife of suburbia) is fetchingly red all over, which could get trying eventually. And, as Mark H mentioned, the lack of signage on the 'conveniences' was mighty amusing, at least after one's first visit, when viewing the first visits of other parishioners. Also, !dang! expensive bottled beer. BOWLING There was bowling and it was very good. Rowan's R!O!C!K!S! with its dingy interior and authentically sticky floor. Cheap bitter, too. I improved no end over the two games played, and demand a rematch at some point. Luckily, I can sneakily get some midweek practice in on the cheap. There was drinking in the pub and eating of Nando's corporate whore chicken chunks, then more drinking and such back at my house for the truly hardcore. Am resolved, having marvelled at the twinkling fingers of Mr Chu on my poor neglected steelstrung acoustic, to relearn the chords that I have forgotten and then some more. E minor, where art thou? Also to spend more time in bed with sinisterines. WANKING What the clever-clever monologue in "Mandingo cliche" is designed to make those of the assembled who are susceptible to girls and social theory do. Like Todd S himself, one would presume. It all makes sense, but there's something rather cynically manipulative about it, added to the wisdom-from-the-mouths-of-babes factor. It would be more interesting if she was a witty and perceptive hideous troll rather than another jobbing actress with perfect teeth. Still, while on the subject of shallowness: WIMBLEDON Mmm, tennis players. Like the Girl from Ipanema, many of them are tall and tanned and young and lovely, not to mention lithe and fit. Phwoar. Cold showers all round, then. Love, Liz :x *** Politeness lasts like a flower, then curls, darkens and returns to itself. Steve Aylett *** _________________________________________________________________ Send and receive Hotmail on your mobile device: http://mobile.msn.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+