Hullo, Well, I know everyone probably doesn't 'member me, but I used to be on sinister when I was 15 or so, and my name is Jenowl. I'm 18, now. It's very scary. I do very adult things like pay bills and call people who are younger than me "kid". So...I hear you all not cry, "what have you been up to in your almost three year absence from sinsterville."? Well, it's funny you should ask, because it's a tale to rival the Boxer and then some. (It's not really, but there were a few come-ons from whores). Well, I left home at the tender age of 16 going on 17, fresh faced, with a binbag full of vinyl records and hopes, to fulfil my lifelong dream of becoming a dental student. I decided that the best place to do this would be Dundee, because London was too scary, and Glasgow had all the hard kids. I stayed in halls, where I didn't get on too well with my brand new flatmates, because they were posse girls, and I had bessie the tarantula too, and they were arachnaophobic, and also I blew up the cooker once. Besides, they kept trying to make me over. I'm really messy and they were really tidy, and they liked to have loud parties and I like to curl up with a good book. That was my first year of uni, which sort of passed in a state of nondescript poverty and the neverending sound of Craig David floating through from the common room. But on the whole I didn't get beaten up, much, so I decided that leaving high school early had been a good choice in the life of me. Bessie agreed, so that was that. But the other thing that happened I looked up from my books long enough to see a boy who was waving frantically and shouting 'pay attention to meeeeee'. He had the looks of a catalogue model, and I respected the fact that he's the only person other than me who I've seen take out Nemesis with a beretta in Resident Evil Three. So we moved in together. The flat is nice; the heating doesn't really work, and there's not often hot water. Our neighbours are horrible, and hard kids come and bang on the windows sometimes, but it has a purple bedroom. Bessie loved it. She's dead now, Bessie. She died last night. I'm not sure how it happened, because I took really good care of her, but she died anyway. She was only 3. I think she was sick. I really miss her, she was really sweet and friendly. I went in to say goodnight to her, and give her some water, and normally when I do that, she goes for a little paddle, but she didn't. And she was all floppy. I don't really know what I'm going to do without her to talk to, she was a good listener, and she only ever bit me a couple of times. I played her Dear Catastrophe Waitress last week, and she really liked it. Her favourite song was You Don't Send Me. I don't like it though, it gives me a headache, but I might play it for her sake. I hope she's up in spider heaven, and that she doesn't hate me for not being a better mum. I ride a motor bike now. It's a Honda CG125 and it's blue and green with L plates and it is my pride and joy. It was all beat up when i got it, but me and my dad fixed it all up, and now it runs like a gem. And I've got a helmet with a Rainbow Brite sticker on it. I've been in a couple of crashes, but I think I must be quite tough deep down, because I've never been seriously hurt, even when there was this one time and I went over some ice and crashed into a ditch and the bike landed on top of me and I got big holes burned in my trousers, but I was ok, and i laughed about it, and the people that saw thought i was nuts. Although, to be fair, they might have been right. But I like eccentric better, I'm less likely to get sectioned that way. What else has changed? Well, I don't wear fairy wings any more (well, sometimes, around the house...) and i've developed a fondness for grey jumpers. I'm listening to FISHYCLAP right now. It's pretty mokeish. I keep skipping songs to get to The Model and There's Too Much Love. I don't think it's actually crap, I think it might just be that I spent Christmas at my friend The Lieutenant's house, and we listened to Anal Cunt a lot. Isn't that just the most non-twee name for a band you can get? They have a plethora of wonderful song titles too, like 'I Got an Office Job for the Sole Purpose of Sexually Harassing Women' and "I Sold Your Dog to a Chinese Resturant". If you like good music, I wouldn't recommend them. They're mokes. Lately, I've been listening to an awful lot of Handel. I like Messiah. And Ooberman's Magic Treehouse, but that record always makes me feel a bit sad, for some reason. Maybe I'm getting nostalgic in my old age. I really hate the song Blossoms Falling, it's rubbish and everyone says it's good. I used to like it years ago, but now it makes me feel like everyone is on acid except me. But I love Sur La Plage, that makes me bounce about all over the shop. And I downloaded Heavy Duty from somewhere, and that is nice and bouncy, like Bees. My christmas present this year from my mum was the Fans Only DVD. It was ace. Did anyone else cry when they watched it? I did but I'm not sure why. The Brit Awards bit was great, I'd forgotten all about that. I think I was 13 or 14 when that happened, and I remember going to school so happy and proud the next day, until I got beaten up by some Steps fans. This is fast becoming the longest e mail I've ever made. I should go, I think. It was nice catching up. I think I might be around, depending on how often I get to use the computer. *waves* Hugs, Jen(owl) +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+