Hello boys and girls A TURNIP FOR THE BOOKS Phew, what a busy weekend I've had, flying to Spain just so I could hang around in Mr Miller's local supermarket (Peter! I was behind the tins of Alphabetti Spaghetti!). I can exclusively reveal to the list that Peter spends a great deal of time in the vegetable section, choosing his potatoes, cucumbers, marrows etc purely on the basis of how they amusingly resemble saucy bits of the anatomy, under the mistaken impression that Esther Rantzen's "That's Life" is still gracing the airwaves. There was one particular moment when he picked up a turnip and seemed close to tears. I can't be sure, but it seemed like he was saying "Oh Tim, Tim, will you ever return, my darling?". TAKE A SINISTER SLEIGH RIDE WITH ME Some people have asked when the next social is at The Poetry Cafe in London. I did mention this before, but it was buried deep in the bowels of an email of mine that made Marcel Proust seem like a snappy, to-the-point kinda guy. To reiterate: December 18 we will be having a Sinister Xmas Party from 7pm onwards at the PoCaff on Betterton St, Covent Garden, London. I'm still pondering whether to provide jelly and ice-cream, in which case their may be a small entry fee. I will put details on the jeepster notice board when I can be arsed. MUPPETRY REV I can only join everyone in applauding the new MercRev Lp. However, I have a fairly fundamental problem which means I find it very difficult to listen to now. Someone once wrote a review of Neil Young, where they said they had always been a great fan until they heard that song - is it "Helpless"? that's the chorus anyway - and the line "Big bird flying across the sky.." They immediately had a mental image of the large yellow resident of Sesame Street gliding across a beautiful sunset, and found it impossible to take poor old Neil seriously again. It's similar with MercRev... I was trying to think who the singer reminded me of for days, then all of a sudden it struck me: remember how Kermit the Frog would sometimes introduce his little nephew, Robin, to sing a song about being halfway up the stairs? Well, as a result I can no longer listen to the lp. Curses. To add insult to injury I cant listen to The Stooges anymore, either. I put on "Raw Power" the other night, only to find myself haunted by the leering face of Jim Henson's most fearsome creation, Robert "son of a manic street preachers' fan", McTaggart. What can you do? SMOKING IS COOL A number of people expressed interest in a bunch of Paul Auster books I got sent, so I thought I would set another competition. As the previous competition tested your powers of poetic creativity, I thought this time I would set a scientific question, to really see who the renaissance lads and ladies are on Sinister. It has been said that Dear old Christopher Leonard is a bit of a renaissance man, what with his computer skills and his mellifluous voice, but judging by his sloping forehead, I would place him a bit earlier. A cro-magnon man, perhaps*. But anyway, the question: Mr Auster once made a film called "Smoke" with the famous french director Roman Polanski. Now, Sir Walter Raleigh once proved in the olden days that it was possible to weigh smoke. On scales. But can you tell me how??? The correct (or most ingenious wrong) answers will be put in a hat, and five winners will receive books. Answers to me privately please before Friday. Stay pressed Stevie Trousers +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list please mail "sinister@majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo@majordomo.net". For list archives and searching, list rules, FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +---+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" +---+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+