Dear Mister I'm-too-good-to-play-a-bloody-gig, This will be the last e-mail attachment I ever send your ass, it's been two years and still no gig, I don't deserve it? I know you got my last two e-mails I typed the addresses on them perfect. So this is the attachment I'm sending you, I hope you run it, I'm on my computer right now, I'm typing at 90wpm on outlook express. Hey Sturan, I drank red bull with quadruple vodkas, you daer me to typpe? You know the song by Spodgenessabounds: "Two pints of lager and a packet of crisps" about that guy who coulda got served at the bar, but didn't, then it was closing time and he didn't get served? This is kinda how this is, I could have seen a gig by you, now it's too late - I'm on 1000 red bulls now - I'm hyper, and all I wanted was a lousy concert in a hall. I hope you know I ripped ALL of my hand drawn pictures of you off the wall. I love you sturan, me and Isobel coulda been together, think about it. You've ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it. And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it. I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me. See Sturan.... Shut up office assistant I'm trying to type! Hey Sturan, that's my computer bleeping on the desk, but I didn't close the window, I just played Beyond the Sunrise on the CD Drive. See I ain't like you, cause if the computer hears the song it'll suffer more, and then it'll probably crash too. Well, gotta go, the computer's about to crash now, oh shit, I forgot, how'm I supposed to send this shit out? <...Ding Ding Dong Dong beyooond the sunriiise thattt eees wheeere weee lived..> <..crash.> <bleep bleep> ====================================================================== Could you put a face to some one else's eyes, is it someone that you'd maybe recognise? but it all fades in the morning when you open your eyes. - Belle & Sebastian +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+