Big Stu bellowed, "So I'll just subtly drop into the conversation that everything they say about tall men with big feet is true." That they make bad dance partners? The only thing worse than slow dancing with a boy who is shorter than you is dancing with a boy who is so tall that you feel like you need to be an Eastern European gymnast just to vault up high enough to say, "Why hello there." Excuse me while I throw out my back and dislocate my shoulder just to get my arms up to where they're supposed to be. Naturally, when I was younger and forced by my paternal units to attend dances which they insisted on calling "mixers," I would always get stuck with the boys with the worst case of halitosis during the really long songs and who treated my feet and shins like a gangplank. After a while I became accustomed to answering queries of "would you like to dance" with "Oh yes! Let's do! It's so nice to meet a man who isn't a pansy about catching my scabies!" *** Pinefox puttered: "The one name I'll now name was the raison d'etre of this whole bash: for the Geezer, Miller turned up. What next - a visit from Llaura Llew?" I actually was going to be in London this month for the London book fair next week. Then, I remembered that London is for Losers! Or rather my bank account is. Thus, none of you have to worry about taking out life insurance or getting that fashionable helmet with harness to wear yet. Next March though.. I would say that Wales for Llewsers but then I'd have to pronounce the double L like I'm supposed to and I'm just not as guttural as I used to be. Sadly, neither is the pinefox. *** "My grandfather used to say that they made the cheese run across the table whilst no one was looking." "originally produced in caves in their respective areas where the mold was naturally present." At first I thought the above quotes were about boys but it turned out that they were about Blue Cheese. Go figure. *** To keep with my theme of quoting, I believe I shall now take a tidbit from my favorite Granny Shag Mag - Bust magazine - everyone's best resource for furry things that vibrate and music reviews that summarize how shaggable the artist is rather than their music (aww yeah). So from Amy Sedaris - to inspire all of you actors out there: "Whenever I had to bring a monologue into an audition I would take something from 'Our Bodies, Ourselves.' I wasn't going to fucking memorize some boring Shakespeare thing that you'd already heard three times a day. Instead it would be, 'I like something small in my anus during lovemaking. No pressure, no movement, just plain there.'" And on that note I shall bid my farewell. obsessed with symmetryrtemmys htiw dessesbo arualaura _________________________________________________________________ The new MSN 8: advanced junk mail protection and 2 months FREE* http://join.msn.com/?page=features/junkmail +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+