Hi everyone, Two things popped into my head last night when I was lying in bed after finishing up "The Autograph Man"- both of which were totally unrelated to the book: Last month, when I was back home, someone said the phrase "twee as fuck" in a record store in downtown Philadelphia. I've heard this before, but never really thought about it. If one were to take "____ as fuck" to mean the maximum, then it brings to mind some sort of limit, like the Limit of Twee as x -> infinity, or something, like a twee asymptote. That's a little too mathy for me though, so I guess a better analogy would be along the lines of a white dwarf star of tweeness (although it's hard for me to imagine what that would mean- densely precious, I guess). The only other interpretation I could think of would be "twee as fuck" means like "twee as sex". But unless your lovemaking regularly involves elements from the Hello Kitty catalogue, I don't think that's very accurate. And second- If the Belle and Sebastian albums were convenience store workers*: Tigermilk- Younger, has some kind of birthmark on her right ear. Engages in inscrutable gum-chewing rituals. Seems to like the Go-Go's. Wears a trucker hat with no pretense at irony. The perfume of loneliness wafts about her. Has long magenta-colored fingernails featuring depictions of black palm trees. Wants to become a waitress and move to Boca Raton. Unabashedly flirts with the regulars. If You're Feeling Sinister- Totally does not belong there. Has the kind of unplaceable sexuality you see in certain tall girls. Irretrievably awkward around customers. Refers to her boyfriend as "my old man". Earnestly believes in the healing power of aromatherapy. Will tell the story of how she got her parrot tattoo at the drop of a hat. Told you once that she liked your mustache. The Boy with the Arab Strap- The manager, a short and slightly overweight man. Looks like former military. Nickname is "Chas", first name is Joshua. Wears his nametag slightly askew. One time accused you of looking at the New York Times for too long without buying it, and slapped it out of your hands. Has impeccably styled hair that smells like Old Spice. Needs to get out of this town, but likes the local high school football team. Fold Your Hands Child, You Walk Like a Peasant- Elderly woman who, if anyone asked, would relate the story of how she seduced a Rockefeller into a backseat sex-fest, eloped with him, and then ended up as a first grade teacher in Illinois after the marriage was annulled by force and money. But no one does ask, since she has breath that could kill a bear. Smells like cat food. Has an unhealthy paranoia about the Pakistani who delivers the Evian. *(a la Jeff Johnson from McSweeney's) Anyway. With regards to Zadie Smith's book, I thought it was excellently written, and just as funny as White Teeth. The main character did bring up one thing that I thought was interesting- he spends some of his time dividing things in the world into that which is 'Jewish' and that which is 'Goyish'. And that made me think that, if one were to apply the same kind of process to B&S songs, which ones would be "Belle-ish" and which ones would be "Sebastian-ish"? I suppose the easy way out would be to divide the entire catalogue along gender-of-singer lines, or possibly along subject matter lines, but I don't think that works very well. So. Hope you're all doing well, Kevin p.s. the subject line refers to the great song by Set Fire to Flames, a Montreal based GY!BE-inbred Alien8 project. I predict that the Constellation-Alien8 axis of post-rock will continue to dominate the pop charts with their very pretty packaging and fantastic output. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+