Today started off well - my first class went quickly and not much was learned - after my first class I walk to the student union on the edge of campus - every m/w/f I go and eat lunch with my friends seth and jules - we sit around and just eat really bad over priced union food and talk about everything that is going wrong in our lives - today though I just happened to run into my imaginary boyfriend - saying he is an imaginary boyfriend sounds weird - he is a real person - very much real - and he knows me - we have talked before - we both used to work at the same store - but he just doesn't know that I think he is completely the cutest person in the world and that we are pretend dating - god now that I write this out it sounds really sad - oh well I guess - so it is - anyways - he was sitting down eating lunch when I saw him from the check out lane - I stared briefly for a moment at him - oh so good looking - with that dark hair and those dark eyes - but then the man at the check out got angry at me for taking so long and yelled something at me which I guessed was some words meaning 'get a move on' - so I dug into my pockets and started sorting through my change - I have been a little short on money lately - so I had to dig through my car to find some money this morning - luckily I found five dollars worth of change under my seat - who knew there was so much money in my car - but anyway - so I was paying with change and staring at my imaginary boyfriend for way too long - people were getting angry - after I got done paying I walked over and saw where my friend seth was going to sit - where we usually sit - in the back atrium type area - it is normally a really good spot to sit - lots of professors and grad students sit out there which is nice cause it makes us feel a tad bit more sophisticated - sad - yes it is - but sometimes you just have to - but I didn't want to go out there - I wanted to go over to the imaginary boyfriend and ask him if I could sit with him - he was at a table for two and I knew it was just fate that it turned out that way - he was waiting for me - so he got a table for two - we could share my french fries and talk coyly over the trivial news in today's daily newspaper - share a laugh and a dreamy glance - I could tell him about the book I am reading now - this side of paradise - about how amory blaine goes through life looking for love - he would then be interested and ask to read it when I am done - (of course since he is my imaginary boyfriend he would be interested and not just act interested just to please me) - which I would gladly give him to read - oh how great it would be to talk to him about anything - just stare at him as he talked about the useless crap he talks about - oh it would be so wonderful - but then my daydream was shattered by the harsh light of reality that was suddenly thrust upon me - as I walked toward him he got up and left - oh no imaginary boyfriend - do not go - what about lunch - what happened to conversation we were to share - what happened to it all - and that is when I knew I it was over - I had to break up with him - it was not going to last anyway - we both had our separate worlds and our own friends - so after a few minutes of standing there and thinking about the future I will never have with the cutest boy in the world - I moved on to the table in the atrium and sat with my friends - it was a sad day - but I know it is better off this way - it is too much work to maintain an imaginary boyfriend - always having to do everything for them - it was just time to end it - but tomorrow is another day - who knows what may happen - much love to you all --scott ---------------------------------------------- what we place most hopes upon generally proves most fatal. - vicar of wakefeild _________________________________________________________________ MSN 8 helps eliminate e-mail viruses. Get 2 months FREE*. http://join.msn.com/?page=features/virus +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+