Furthering the niceness tip, do many Sinisterines do
Hello sam said: <<I'm going to be on 15-1>> Did you know that William G Stewart, presenter of 15 to 1, was friends with Robin Askwith of Confessions of a Window Cleaner fame? He was, you know. I read it in his biography in a bookshop once. I hid the book inside a copy of Delia Smiths How to Cook Eggs. I think we should set a few challenges for Sam to do during his appearance on the telly. Mine is to try to get him talking about Mister Askwith. Here is my plan: When youre downing a few consolatory drinks with Mister Stewart after the show and you run out of things to say, you should casually say something like: "Hey Willy, I saw a triffic film on the telly last night. It was called Confessions of a Window Cleaner and it was the funniest thing Ive seen for donkeys. The things a man can do with a shammy leather and a bucket of soapy water Id never have believed." At this point, William Gs expression of dutiful boredom, which he usually wears when talking to washed up losers will turn into one of expectant curiosity. Now youve got his interest you could follow up your opening sentence with something like: "Oh yes, Willy, I do like a sweaty bottom" or maybe: "Oh yes, Willy, I had a BIG wank" or even just "Oh yes! Willy!" By now William G will be vigorously nodding in agreement and youll be getting along like best buddies. If youre lucky hell start telling you about all his crazy adventures he used to have when he was a lad, like the time he decided to become a driving instructor and girls tops fell off whenever they were doing an emergency stop. After all this you could Report Back with all the funny stories William G has told you. It would be like Confessions of a Quiz Show Host. So go on Sam, dont just do it for me - do it for Sinister! Jennings said: << this? Asked young mark. He was talking about giving blood. Well I did a few weeks ago.. It wasn't as painful as I thought it was going to be but you can still get a fairly large amount of sympathy when you show your plaster... I was a wee bit embarrassed about all the questions they asked me ("well... no... kinda... yes... well") and then I received my blood card thingy in the post this morning and it turns out I'm A positive. Plain old run of the mill A positive. Well I won't be doing that again. Hmph.
Im B positive, so dont ring me for a donation if you get your foot stuck in a Breville in a bizarre blending accident. I tried to give blood last week and the nurse asked me if Id had any illnesses recently. I said, "Well, not really, I had a bit of a cold at the weekend but Im over it now." and she told me that I was DISEASED and that if I gave blood then I would KILL BABIES. I thought it was a bit harsh to have gone along, altruistically willing to let old women suck blood out of my arms for the sake of the common good, only to be branded a BABY KILLER. I shouldnt imagine its in the governments NHS guidelines. Robin x ps: Does anyone know what the G in William G Stewart stands for? My moneys on Gaylord. __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Everything you'll ever need on one web page from News and Sport to Email and Music Charts http://uk.my.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+