Hello Playmates, That sitcom idea of Mark's has inspired me, and so I've come up with some fine ideas for the Sinister sitcom. I toyed with "Carry on romping" (starring Kenneth Williams as Stu Murdo, Charles Hawtrey as Stu D, with Bernard Bresslaw fitting the Fatty Hopkins role - maybe "fitting" isn't the right word, filling is probably more appropriate) but once I'd cast Hattie Jacques as Honey and Babs Windsor as Katrina, I ran out of ideas. Then I thought of those wonderful gentle Sunday evening comedies that Julian says I love so much. I was seriously considering "Oh! Doctor Mitchell", before I realised that it was, in fact, bollocks. I rejected "Are you being Sinister" (though Keith shouting "I'm free" did have a certain appeal). "Allo, allo" got a look in too, but Genevieve in a French maid's uniform and my great plan for the part of Herr Flick got rejected as being...err, dodgy. So, it's going to be the Terry and Joooooon option, I'm afraid. It's set in leafy suburbia, a cul de sac populated by seemingly normal Daily Mail readers, but closer imspection reveals that them to be ... strange. So here's the cast: Mr Trousers: the earnest commuter, married to Susannah, a buxom young woman with a sexual appetite to make one blush. She's always suggesting he takes time out of his busy schedule or "can't you have it off for once in your life?" as she puts it. Every episode revolves around his attempts to avoid sex. However, this does not mean he isn't interested, and his attentions are drawn frequently drawn to: Honey, the dazzling young blonde from next door. But Honey has a strange secret tucked away. Can you guess what it is viewers? Needless to say, Honey works at a fruit and veg shop, and Trousers is very partial to ripe, firm melons. Esme, the mousy librarian always turning up at inoppurtune moments. Anne has offered her services and suggested she has telekinetic powers, which she is amusingly unaware of. As far as I'm concerned this means she can make people's trousers fall down with the blink of an eye. Anne also suggested that Esme is constantly referring to her imaginary husband, who I shall call Mr Flopp. She is completely bonkers. Mr Dandycock (played by Keith), a camp hairdresser, who lives with his "brother" Rodney. Mr Dandycock fancies Mr Trousers rotten, and is forever suggesting he "pops round the back". For a cup of tea. Inspector Ramsbottom, the local policeman, played by Peter Miller. Ramsbottom is a jovial old lech, forever being called the scene of Trousers compromising predicaments. Often he will call round to the Trousers residence and will knock at the door and comment on Susannah's "magnificent knockers". Until next time...shake your booty, Love Tag x ----------------------------------------------------------------------- . This message was brought to you by the Sinister mailing list. . To send to the list please mail "sinister@majordomo.net". . For subscribing, unsubscribing and other list information please see . http://www.majordomo.net/sinister . For questions about how the list works mail owner-sinister@majordomo.net . Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa -----------------------------------------------------------------------