well i failed my test again today. I turned the air inside the car blue with my bad language, and i was shaking and sweating with nerves. I fucking hate tests. One thing, when we were at school, doing written exams. You could go back and check if you'd done alright. But I've always hated practicals. Oral exams in German and later, Norwegian. Practical exam in chemistry. And then the dance exams I had. I've probably failed most practical exams I've sat. It was my own fault though, and the examiner was a pretty fair bloke, so I'm not going to blame him in some conspiracy theory paranoia. I failed FIVE BLOODY FUCKING FEET from the test centre as I returned. I thought I'd failed earlier, but he'd been good about that apparently. I thought I'd hit the kerb/ He said I'd brushed it. He said there were different degrees of hitting a kerb, and had taken my side on that. But I couldn't really hear what he was saying. I was just thinking "Shit. Thats another £50 I'll have to fork out to get my license". I've spent well over £200 on tests alone. No idea what the lessons have cost me. I could have bought a car probably, for the total value. Or a plane. Yeah. Learn to fly, girl, learn to fly. At least then you won't get caught up in traffic jams. I'm not as gutted as I was last time. I think I just went back to bed last time, and lay in bed, hating everyone. All my friends being supportive. All the people asking how I did. All the people wishing me luck. Because by failing, I knew I'd be asked, and have to sit through the same conversations a million times before the weekend was out. I knew exactly what people would say. This time, I think they know. Cos they know what I'm like when I fail. Its a case of "leave me alone." So I didn't spend the day in bed. Well, not all of it. My disappointment isn't as bad as it was last time. Although - AND THIS IS FUCKING PATHETIC - i was watching new nutrigrain advert, and it had this woman washing her car and then it started to rain and shes thinking "typical". And I felt a bit sad - I want a car to wash*. right well. there you go. Stop wishing me luck those of you that do. You're bloody jinxing me with your bad luck ways. love idles * A car of my own, I am not offering myself for car washing. A car I can own, drive, and curse when it does things wrong and costs me a fortune to get fixed. Maybe by the time I pass they'll have an even newer model of the little hot clio I want. ===== <a href="http://retrosec.blogspot.com/">http://retrosec.blogspot.com/</a> thoughts __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Everything you'll ever need on one web page from News and Sport to Email and Music Charts http://uk.my.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+