Lucy the Juicy wrote: "I dont know what to wear to the picnic. Jeans will be too hot for the gig but a skirt might be too cold for the picnic. I could bring a second outfit and wriggle into it in some pokey toilet cubicle, but then Id have to carry all that stuff around with me and a rucksack never goes down well at a gig. In fact, its almost as bad a crime as standing in front of me with your long, frizzy hair, so it gets stuck in my sweaty cleavage, or barging down the front when youre the tallest man in the house (cf Big Stu only joking!) Girls, I need advice, what shall I do?" ***This advice is aimed not only at Lucy, but girls generally, and is musings to be considered and any further additional comment welcome*** I am still considering what to wear. I know its over a week to the gig, but a girl has gotta plan! Thing about wearing a skirt: tights. Always have spare tights. Thats fine - you can bundle it up into a tiny ball in your pocket. Alternatively, offer your lad the opportunity to go all 80's Wham and pop it in his pocket. Albeit that it will be a bit at an angle, and it might look more like an over inflated bollock than throbbing member. What shoes to wear? trainers with a skirt? is that ok? or are we in danger of getting a bit too much like Nat off of Eastenders wearing trainers and a skirt? particularly if its long and denim. Looks ok, but I'm going off it, and white trainers are right off my list of tasteful things to wear. I saw a ned granny walking down Maryhill wearing a long denim skirt with a split up the back and white trainers. If she had a face that was worth buying a mirror for, then it mightn't have been so bad, but cos she looked haggard, its really put the last nail in the coffin for me denim skirts with white trainers. It is possible to pack a second outfit - you only need a skirt and perhaps, shoes. I'd recommend no high heels. Naturally, a girl has got to look like a proper sexy mistress (something Lucy manages at every Winchester and NPL I've been to anyway), but you know, it gets sore. And all day. And what if there is walking? I did that once, and really, I learnt to regret. Hobbling is not a quality of a sexy mistress. So its got to be low heels or flatties really, isn't it? Then there is the issue of picnics. So it might be dry, but what if the ground is a bit damp and you know, your shoes get a bit muddy? Not chic. Not at all. Unless you have grass all over your back and a wicked little glint in your eye and matching smile, in which case you might get away with it. You could always pack your stuff in your boyfriends rucksack and let him be your mule for the night. Promise him he can have stallion duty afterwards. Alternatively, if you know someone who lives within changing distance do that. Somewhere within walking distance of the picnic venue.. so towards the end of the picnic you can nip off and change "quickly". Perhaps the other alternative would be to go for a tunic. I would do this if I had the guarantee that my thighs were going to be a little more cooperative than they have been for the last seven years. Strip off the jeans in a pokey cubicle and voila, one oh so cute mini dress. Don't bend over at the waist though. Tunics are apparently ok to wear, although I still have nightmares about when those girls used to wear white bootcut tight polyester trousers with the wrap around skirt. Or, just bring a spare top. Something glam for the evening, and something casual for the daytime. Add a bit of jewelry and a good dose of fantastic cleavage (I've heard that in boyland, there is no such thing about bad cleavage. Unless you think about Tori Spelling. That girl needs to get her tits to be a bit more friendly with one another). One pair of spare shoes and a teeny bag which is all you need really for shoes and a top (ok, and make up, a hair brush, camera, and anything else you might pack). Maybe we should all just buy flymos. they apparently squish and squash stuff into a tiny compartment. Clever hover? One point about frizzy hair- my tips to avoid calamity: 1. buy frizz ease 2. Use it. 3. Tie long hair into a bun 4. Avoid moisture in the air at the picnic by wearing a headscarf. No bandanas please, you are not the Duchesses of York, thank you. Headscarves are a bit Isobel Campbell, but if the perm story is true, then I'm guessing frizz might be a bit along her street too. 5. Wear an alice band and keep it neat 6. Get your heads shaved 7. Wear something with a hood. 8. Go to the pub. Hmm. Ok this is hard work trying to decide what to do. I think I need to go shopping. love idles ===== <a href="http://retrosec.blogspot.com/">http://retrosec.blogspot.com/</a> thoughts __________________________________________________ Yahoo! Plus For a better Internet experience http://www.yahoo.co.uk/btoffer +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+