So, Sinister... It's been a long time... Does it matter? I hope not... Haven't listened to our favourite band for soooooo long. Music is such a trigger of emotions sometimes it's so painful. I read and don't read posts, but I save them all! And go back to them...and read them like it's a book...an everlasting book...Somedays I get sad cos once I was soooooo devoted... ah well... so,old friend, it's not the end. ah...I had a lot to write and now i'm all shy again. Fuck it... I could never break into a conversation, too many sets of eyes would strike right back at me and, paraphrasing The Dirtbombs, I just can't take it. But lets try. I know I will sound like an old lady even though I am only at the tender age of 23, but people grow up and people change and suddenly it hits you that some of your best and oldest friends are..well..assholes.Not nice anymore.But how can one accept this?it's so frustrating.Especially when you see all that in a totally different context from what you knew throught your life.And what's even more frustrating is that these people that you have known ALL YOUR BASTARD LIFE are trying to show off to you!How pathetic is that?My friend- who is 23 too-told me "All the things I didn't do when I was 18, I'm doing them now"...how ridiculous is that? You are only 23!I mean, how wise are you now to realise that life has passed you by within 5 years so fuck around before it's too late?!I know...i'm whinging...i'm a grumpy sod...sue me. I don't know...I am unemployed for the past 4 months mind you...it's a state of mind that I want to parallel with being menopausal .not that i know how it is being menopausal personally but i do have the experience of attending the Mother menopause...so i can figure how it is , right? it's just insane...too much free time is as frustrating as a billion word PhD paper, I'm sure... It's not nice being unemployed..eeek..i hate the sound of this word...un-em-ployed...eeek...application forms SUCK big time... Q:"why do you wanna work for us then now?" ANSWER: option A: "I'm great!" option B: "I like your hair" option C: "As a recent graduate..blah blah...contributed in maintaining team spirit...blah blah...Oxford...blah blah...wrote a book that won Booker prize...blah blah...." option D: " I want a job." *sobs* And in other news - tee he...Big Stu used it and I got inspired- I think that The Hellacopters bring out my inner something. I mean when a song is called "I wanna touch" and it contains the following lyrics : She got me shaking But there's no room for moving in my bunk I'm seeing double and my pants are in trouble I'm tired of this right hand funk well...it gets me tap-tapping my feet AT LEAST tee he Hellacopters respect and they're fine looking lads too ha! nice talkin' to ya! 'til we meet again Z ------------------------------------------------------------------ " Passivity in life, in politics, is problematic: it means acquiescing to a status quo that damages people along class, gender, racial, sexual and other lines." R. Dyer +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+