Sinister: Fuck My Shitty Pussy
hello Sinister, ******CURSING****** realising that swearing is the new saying goodbye to breams (which was the new "I heart Ken Chu", which was the new posting, which was the new lurking which is just so passe now its almost retro chic )I thought I'd join in before the Daily Mirror caught on to the latest summer trend and made it untrendy, what with all the plebs doing it too. The subject line, IF it gets through firewalls of those of you at work (heh heh- I can't wait for you to explain this to your line managers... "no.. "fuck my shitty pussy".. its from this mailing list I'm on, see......I can explain... ") was one of the first things I learnt to say when I went to Norway. I learnt to say various other things before hand, but this wasd the most amusing and possibly widely applicable sentence. Alternatively, I could have given this post some "slight" content, and written something along the lines of "fuck this shit(ty pussy)". But I didn't. Bandwagons and all that, are fine. I jump on them when I need to hitchhike a wee bit, but not for the entire journey. Anyway. *** YOU ALL LOVE NEIL ROBERTSON NOW *** all he had to do was talk dirty, and you're over excited. Forget the band. Its Neil you secretly follow. I'd make examples of you all, but I can't be bothered. Was it because he made it cool to say naughty words? Hes such a bad boy, isn't he. Worthers Originial rebel. I can imagine him now. Actually, I've never actually met him, but I have this mental image in my mind that he looks like Woody out of Toy Story. Only in a black leather biker jacket. "Theres a snake in my boot!" indeed. :-) ***ATISHOO, ATISHOO, WE ALL FALL DOWN**** My hayfever is driving me up the wall. I've taken so many tablets over the years for it, nothing works anymore. I've tried Pirotin, Zirtek, Benadryl, Clarityn, Boots own brand and anything else that sounds vaguely like a vulcan character name from Star Trek. It doesn't work anymore. The drowsy ones, the non drowsy, the 24 hour ones, the couple of hour ones... all useless. So I've devised a new plan. I take two. Two 24 hour tablets, at the same time, of different brands, three or four times a day. It leaves me feeling lathargic to the extent of falling over, mind you, but short of shoving them up my nose and into my tear ducts to stop this hayfever, its the only thing to offer me any relief. I sleep a lot at the moment, I go to work, I come home, I sleep til the morning from usually about 10pm. And then I have to drag myself out of bed. The other side effect is I can't concerntrate at work and I get tired, which is why I drop a couple of caffeine tablets to get me through. And I sleep a lot too. I suffer pretty badly from hayfever. Some people get away with the occasional sneeze. But my entire life, for 4 weeks, is a nightmare. from the point when i get up in the morning (the soap I use makes me sneeze, stopping sneezing enough to have my breakfast, holding my head at certain angles to avoid a runny nose, taking the train in the morning which goes through the nice fucking LEAFY bits.. fuck you other passengers with your open windows. I notice, and I feel like death), to leaving work (why can't they just tarmac over princes street gardens and anything vaguely green? ok, so nowhere to have picnics, but we'd soon get used to astro turf) to everything. I can't take a walk in a park. I come home and spend the next few hours with sore eyes. I can't just talk- I end up sneezing mid conversation and its frustrating so I don't talk. I feel so hellishly grumpy too. And really, I'm so moody. If you see me, cross the road and avoid me for the next week or so. Its the best thing. People have this thing, where they go "oh, I've just sneezed. I must be getting hayfever" like its a cold, that comes and goes. I've taken to ignoring them. They antagonise me so easily. People have this other thing, where they see me suffering, and they go "oh, I take one pirotin (or other well known brand of allergy tablet) and I'm fine". Its different for different people. I don't care. I suffer badly. I wake up in middle of the night, sneezing and itching and I need to take tablets. A good night is where I wake up once. Some people go "but it was raining yesterday". Pollen count means fuck all to my body. Some pollen stays airborne regardless of temprature. "you should get a nasal spray" "have you tried...(insert well nown brand name of allergy tablet here)?" Durr. Like, eh, no. Of course not, you dildo! I've just been fucking suffering for the hell of it. It wasn't til you pointed it out, and I saw the light of my error of my medicinal ways. I hate it when people offer: a. diagnosis; b. advice like "take a tablet/ use an eye wash/ try nasal sprays" that quite frankly, is like saying to a blind person "Have you considered getting a guide dog?". c. Who think they know how I feel becuase they have a sniffle, although it might be a cold. d. Who make fun of my variety of sneezing sounds I'm not trying to be "I suffer worse than anyone ever" about this, but after ten years of one month a year hell, and you know, it drives me insane. A good year is when I don't get conjunctivitis, and wake up with my eyelashes glued together, and have to fumble about until I find the bathroom and can bathe my eyes. hayfever makes my skin itch, especially over the bridge of my nose with my sinuses. It makes my ears itch, and my throat itch. It makes me grumpy, and moody and depressed. I sneeze so much I don't bother talking much if I can help it, my nose runs so badly I try and keep my head at a normal angle and not bend over too often. Making rumaging around in my handbag a nightmare. Nasal sprays make me sneeze and are only good if i have a blocked nose- and then it becomes a runny nose. I keep my bedroom window firmly shut every night for four weeks. And i notice when a window is open, without even seeing it. In the past I've tried meditating myself to sleep after taking tablets which works partially. I just have to induce a sleepy state, relaxing my muscles and stop sneezing/ itching long enough to fall asleep. I've used eye pads, bathe twice daily on the worst days, and I never go outside if I can avoid it. So you know, people irritate me too, with their pop knowledge medical wisdom. Best not to say anything. I have two options left: 1. I go to a private clinic and pay to get a vaccine for my hayfever. (it is possible, apparently what it is is this. Plant pollen basically sees your nose tissue as the sort of tissue it wants to pollenate. What with your nostrils being all warm, wet and sexy. In some people, the body is cool with this. In other people like me, its not. And the immune system gets over excited and sees it as an attack. "No bloody flower is gonna have pollenate with my body!" type thing. So it sees the pollen as a threat, and releases histimine. What the vaccine does is to identify the allergy, and then, since the immune system of a sufferer sees the pollen as a threat, the vaccine works like a vaccine for any illness or virus or threat. Hey. If you can't beat it, go with it). 2. I go on holiday for 4 weeks a year to Alaska during hayfever season. Ugh. Sympathy to fellow hayfever sufferers. Well, thats my major rant over and done with. Please listen and learn. I'm thinking ahead to next week, and the talk of the picnic in glasgow, and whether thats a good idea. No parks. Lets meet up in a concrete block. please. ***Bangbang*** Earlier this evening, I was sitting in the living room being ignored by Mick. Sometimes he sits on my lap, while I massage his head, other times he ignores me. Tonight I wasn't good enough for him. Mick is the neighbours elderly cat, by the way. Then we heard a gunshot. no idea where from or anything, but it was something of an event in the leafy commuter town middle class area that I live in, and will no doubt be the subject of many a neighbourly gossip for weeks to come, regardless of whether anything further develops from it. And even if anything doesn't imaginations are wonderful creations for filling in gaps and creating drama and exagerration, to make a story more interesting, and hoepfully make the story teller more interesting. ****EVERYONE HAS A NOVEL INSIDE THEM**** I don't know if the above is true, but thought I'd write it anyway. Sinister is one of those mailing lists, I am aware, whose listees are generally creative. Its an odd place really, with more of a quota of creative minds than elsewhere, an unnatural surge of imaginative minds all gathering in sinister. Some of us are musicial, others are painters and illustrators. Some write, others sing, others make things. Well, this is for the writers among you. You with your film scripts, with your stories, and poems and even your posts. I bought a book the other week which has had me enthralled. Its a magical book, which seems to feed my enthusiasm to write and my imagination to develop. Irs called "The Creative Writing Coursebook" from my old uni, University of East Anglia, and is filled with advice and excercises for writers to try to use, ideas to help you develop and build and create, and perhaps even just use when you want to start writing something but have a writers block or no ideas. Its published by Macmillan, and I've found it a fantastic read and inspiring. So i thought I'd let you know, if any of you might be looking for such a book. right, I'm off to perform strange practises upon my body and try and sleep. Love, idleberry ===== http://groups.yahoo.com/group/corduroysmoke/ starting playground gossip and passing notes __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Yahoo! - Official partner of 2002 FIFA World Cup http://fifaworldcup.yahoo.com +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+
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idleberry