I'm so glad, truly, that you would like to leave me locked in your closet while your friends come over. I like to stay there, in the dark in the cool dark. It's comforting. I know they'll never see me. It's so much easier there in the closet, with the door locked tight. And it was even better when you finally left the room yourself (I could hear the door shutting, quietly, but I could hear it from inside the closet - I'm good at listening). Finally, I was alone again. I heard a story once, that if you go into a place that's truly, truly dark, like a mine, or the bottom of the ocean, that you go blind. Just because, your eyes can handle the darkness. It was dark in your closet. But it wasn't _that_ dark. There was a little of the dusty dim venetian blind light, and it snuck in under the crack of the door, and it lit up your sock. Or was it your underwear? Like I said, it wasn't _that_ dark, but it was dark. I stayed there for a long time, a long time, with your clothing hanging all around my head. Polyester dresses, and that nylon skirt, I could tell which one it was by the zippy nylon sound. That was odd, because skirts don't have zippers. I amused myself by wondering what your friends looked like. Well, I guess they look like you. A lot of your friends look a lot like you. One of your friends told you (in the special secret code you have) that it would be a good idea to lock me in the closet. After all, if your friends saw me, who knew what could happen? She thought I didn't know what she was saying in the secret code, but she was wrong. I knew. I'm good at listening. So it was into the closet for me. So here I am, in your closet. The only thing I miss, really, are the trees and the bugs. The trees, because I've always thought green is nice, and trees have so many shades of green and against the blue sky, well... There's nothing nicer than a green tree waving against a blue sky. As for the bugs, they make me feel better about myself. Mainly, because they nothing to do with you. I've been reading this book called 'life on a little known planet.' It's about bugs. And the title is good you know, because that's why bugs are good. They have _nothing_ to do with me. Or you. Or anybody. I mean sure they carry lyme's disease and eat tomatoes and killed one fourth of europe during the black plague, but, when you look at a bug, I mean really look at a bug, there's no point of reference. It's an outsider. It has nothing to do with you. It has no interest in you. And confronted with such a thing, isn't it easy to forget yourself? And that's all anybody ever really needs, to forget himself. It's not an easy thing to do. Bugs help. So, sitting, stuck in your closet, I missed the bugs, and the trees, and listened to the secret code you and your friends were mumbling in out in the parlor. And even tho the dusty dim venetian blind light could sneak in under the closet door and light up your clothing, the murmurings of you and your friends were too far out beyond the closet door, out beyond the parlor door, out beyond the reach of my good hearing. Just too far, and the sound of your secret code became incomprehensible even to me, even to my sharp ears, and finally I was alone, finally I was alone, and the murmurings, I suppose they were yours, blurred into the song of a cicada, or a dizzy cricket, or a crooked wandering grasshopper. And I sighed in relief. __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Talk to your friends online with Yahoo! Messenger. http://im.yahoo.com +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+