Dear people, I feel icky, but then again I always slightly nauseous when Ally Cook is in town. I've been absent from these fair Sinister waters for a while as I've been conducting my own Big Brother experiment by locking 10 slugs in a shoebox. It's all on the web, the one that gets voted off every week gets salted, oo you should have seen that silly Mel Slug shrivel up. Its at http://slugsdiehere.com. It's all very interesting, you should see the slugs in a jacuzzi it really is quite a beautiful sight, well it's more a puddle in an ashtray that I blow into with a straw but the slugs like it. The only problem came when I left them for a few minutes and a flatmate dipped Darren Slug in a tomato garlic dip and ate him. I did have an argument with said flatmate at the hospital while his stomach was being pumped out about whether slugs are just snails without mobile homes. But I think I lost it again, a bit like Ethel was doing just before she died. You know when your mind goes blank and all you think about is fish and watching your back for sharks? Anyway, RIP Ethel, I just hope Dot can live with herself. I know I couldn't live with her, but at least I tried, some things just aren't meant to be... Actually one of the slugs left a trail to a gingerbread cottage but that's another story of super shiny boys. I mean letting girls walk over you is one thing but slugs? Actually speaking from personal experience it's nearly as exciting as duct tape. Sorry I lost the plot again haven't I? It's not easy holding a grasp on reality after having intentionally eaten a Pot Noodle. But don't worry, I am happy. Christiaan talked about nudity and trucks which was nice. Reminded me of a holiday in Skegness involving a fleet of Eddie Stowbarts, two Latvian Au Pairs and a Super Size Snicker. Those were the days... Did anyone see that bloke who rode the Big Dipper rollercoaster or whatever for 3 months? He obviously was a big dipstick. I mean like anyone, I have a lot of respect for what Ronan Keating says but I'm pretty sure Life is a Rollercoaster is more an analogy for the ups and downs of life rather than an instruction to strap yourself in and just riding it for 3 months. Or something. Never take anything too literally from someone who wears my parent's curtains for trousers. Well all's well that ends well. Te ra, Martin P.S I went to a foreign land recently, it was big and had Target stores that sell Target pants. Thank you for everyone who put up with me including lovely Little Bitch Julie, Bareback Ree, Silver Space Cowboy Ben, Dancing Queen Brian, 2-Pad King Phil, Liftspray Matt... oh I'm making all these people it's obvious isn't it? I mean how could anyone ever get the nickname Liftspray? I admit it, I spent the whole time over there in cheerleader camp. It was the time of my life, I'd never felt that way before. It's amazing what you can do with a pom pom. +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+