Oh, hello sinister What a disaster!! The whole weekend has been nothing else but a sheer-turtle-disaster! I told you we were going to have a family reunion at the family's cottage. Well, we did! And it all went worse than I could possibly imagine... First of all, Big Aunt Myrtles invited to our family reunion that disgusting macaroni dandy, the one she wants to marry me off to! Yes! His name is Giovanni Gregorio d'Arnazzio... Yes! And she invited him to the family reunion! She thought it would be a good chance for me to meet him! So, he arrived there on Saturday! What can I say about him? he is very good-looking, the way italians are, tall, thin, dark hair, with a nice tan. he's 30 years old and God is he rich! My dad loved him at once! But the poor fool, he'd do anything to please Aunt Myrtles! You should have seen him; the whole weekend he was just strolling about auntie, trying to make himself agreable to her anyway he could! Oh how much I despise him for that! Me and Theodor (my cousin), were away when my "fiance" arrived! We love to walk up the hill that is near the cottage! There's a little river there and we love to go swimming! So, we were racing each other down the hill when we saw this fancy car entering our garden. And then this really handsome bloke getting out of the car... I heard Theodor sighing! I think I can tell you that now; I strongly believe that Theodor is gay, but a "in-the-closet" one! He never talked to me about it, but I'm sure he's about to... poor Theodor!! And he has to marry this blonde, washed off cow! And he really did sigh when he saw Giovanni! This slimy excuse for a man! I do hope Giovanni is gay so we can keep him in the family, and aunt turtle will be happy, and Theodor will be happy, and most of all, I will be happy... And besides, I heard from my good friend Althea, whose father owns the cottage next to ours, that he's an awful lover! and not really "gifted" if you know what I mean!! So, family dinner... we all sat at this huge table, aunt Myrtles on the head of it and my dad on the other edge. I sat next to Theodor and Giovanni opposite to me! He was looking at me all the time with his wet eyes, that look like 2 olives thrown in olive oil! And then that waiter started to serve us! I'd never seen him before, he was one of the extras aunt Myrtle hires sometimes for special occasions. Oh was he cute! I couldn't take my eyes of him! And he wasn't indifferent to me, mind you! Who would anyway? Then I asked for permission to be excused, and as I was getting up from my chair holding a glass full of water, I accidentally bumbed onto the poor waiter! As a result all the water fell on my white silk shirt! Now you can imagine what happened! The waiter couldn't take his eyes off my erm... wet shirt; aunt Myrtles started to get red and stretched her neck in the most disgusting manner I had ever seen! What is this thing with me and commoners? I think Theodor has it too, as I suspect that he's secretly having this crush over auntie's gardener Arthur! He walks around him everytime he's hoeing auntie's famous rosetrees! But I shall stop now and come back with more adventures from that disastrous weekend some other time... Because I'm sure you'll all want to know how Giovanni sneaked into my room and Theodor got caught with Arthur in the stables! yes!! oh another thing! Honey, that luxurious little girl that happens to be a princess too, so I'm allowed to talk with her and be friends with her, said that there's a sinister anniversary! 3 years of sinister! and she suggested that on that day we should all wear underwear that would have the same colour! I really liked this idea! it could only come from a nobel mind! What I suggest is that we all wear undies in red! And I wonder, miss Honey, am I allowed to wear stockings too or is it against the rules? Pauline L. Shivers that makes sinister all quivers She's that aristocratic slag Who lives and reigns in Prague PS: Lucy made some anagrams with my name!

It occurred to me that Pauline L Shivers is one of those names you could get a lot of anagrams out of. Here are a few: Nashville Super I A Level Irish puns Punish Vera Ellis I slurp Helen Avis Hi puss, learn evil I liked them all!! But I really loved the "I slurp Helen Avis" and "Hi puss, learn evil" ones!! God!! I can use them as my sign off!!! Or as a code with my commoner lovers!! Thank you Lucy!!

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