these things have happened. i listened to some of the songs on storytelling and wasn't as excited as i expected to be. i found and lost a job. i went out of the house and came back again, many times. i rode on trams and looked out the window, my eyes focused on the middle distance. i booked tickets to sydney and new york and london and wondered if i should go. i flirted for hours with a computer programmer and because i have not flirted in a while i felt uncomfortably alive. i ate tibetan white tara cakes, which my sister made. white tara cakes are supposed to be made by monks wearing white, meditating on absolute purity. everything in them is white except for the honey. the cakes should be blessed with all the qualities of tara, peace and benevolence and compassion. but ours weren't blessed. we sat around the kitchen table and ate them with chocolate spread. there's a david shrigley cartoon which has 2 columns: one labelled "things i should have paid attention to," the other "things i actually paid attention too." (again, paraphrasing). when i should have been paying attention to Big Things, Important Things, decisions which, if botched, would fundamentally alter the course of my life, these are the things i paid attention to: the sour pollution smell which came in the window a couple of days ago, took up residence in the house and wouldn't leave slo-motion shots of skiing accidents on tv - bodies drifting through the air with balletic grace and slow cold clouds of powder snow rising up behind them two birds following each other across the darkening sky. love to all sophia x _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ "sick posse of f**ked in the head psycho-fans" - NME June 2001 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-+ Snipp snapp snut, sa var sagan slut! +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+