'Ello 'ello 'ello What 'ave we 'ere then? What are you bunch of reprobates up to? What? You mean you're actually behaving yourselves? I think you're lying. I think you want Santa to think you've been good girls and boys so he'll bring a sackful of Girl's Worlds and Fashion Wheels and Scalextrics and Mr Potato Heads and Remus Basket Weaving Sets when he comes a-tumblin' down the chimney. I'd be happy with some of the lovely glittery elastoplasts like wot they've got in Superdrug at the moment because I'm a little wounded soldier. I have a big scab on my knee which cracks every time I bend it and catches on the inside of my cords when I walk. It will be ripe for picking in a few days time but for the moment I just need to cover it up. Of course, the Big Question is, what is the best method of plaster-removal? Mum always went for the quick rip approach but the very thought of it makes my eyes water. Not quite as much as the thought of scrubbing with a nail brush at the sticky bits that are left on your leg. Ow, Ow, OW! Let's have some headings... BLACK BORDERED BIT It is with the deepest regret that I announce that my littlest friend, my dear hamster, Thurston, has gone to hammy heaven. I converted a hair dye box into a little hammy coffin and laid him in it and covered him with woolly hammy bedding and buried him under the rosemary bush in the back garden. And shed a little tear. I have such happy memories of him rolling around a home-made hammy assault course in his plastic ball and if I shut my eyes I can still feel him crawling up my arm, over my shoulder and down the back of my cardigan. I'll leave a decent period of mourning (two weeks) and then go out and buy Thurston II. CONTENT? My car stereo plays tapes a bit too speedy-like. Monsieur Murdoch sounds like Bonnie Langford. Isobel's voice is so high pitched that it cannot be detected by humans, but an ever-growing pack of dogs lollops along behind the car, tongues flopping out between their slobbery chops. Not a pretty thing to glimpse in the rear-view mirror. But, as we all know, dogs refuse point blank to break the speed limit so, with a quick burst of the accelerator I can manage a getaway before they do any damage to the exhaust pipe. FILTH Fiona wrote

...

do you think you could take household objects and have them battered? you could gradually build up a battered room and a battered house, and eventually a battered empire. cover the world in batter!!!

Batter is a strange old thing, isn't it? The very thought of it makes me laugh. Funny Batter. Marie wrote about

...

the trousers-under-skirt look, which -- although it may be cool now -- was definitely a dorky thing back then.

Such speshal fwiend pun potential. Time to give my digits a rest, methinks. Juicy Lucy =================================================== This communication contains information which is confidential and may also be privileged. It is for the exclusive use of the intended recipient(s). If you are not the intended recipient(s), please note that any distribution, copying or use of this communication or the information in it is strictly prohibited. If you have received this communication in error, please notify the sender immediately and then destroy any copies of it. -- MCI WorldCom Year 2000 information http://www.wcom.co.uk/2000 +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the reborn Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail "sinister@majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo@majordomo.net". WWW: http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+