Hey, hey, hey, All this talk about pets, especially fish has to stop. Its making me maudlin, as it reminds me of my two long-lost goldfish, Mashy and Tashy (no laughing!), who met a most untimely and horrendous end. I sat on them. I'd rather not say anything else, as my eyes are misting up as we speak. Apologies to anyone in Dundee, but Seymour Stein is a jammy bastard if he hasn't yet been there. Even Dundonians concur that its the shittiest place in the world, with the exception of my home town Hamilton, which is generally viewed with abject terror by most outsiders (Fact: Hamilton was the first place in Britain to have the curfew imposed for under 16s. Now that's something to be proud of), Montrose, a grim former fishing port that is caught somewhere in the mid-sixties (you know the town in "Heartbeat"? Its like that, only with more neds. And a fishy odour), and Arbroath, half way between Dundee and Montrose (that's bad), which is like Dundee's scabbiest estate dropped on the grimmest part of the North Sea coast, with the added bonus of even more neds, a huge percentage of jakies per capita and a large military base nearby, hereby guarunteeing you a good kicking every night. For the rest of your life. (An example of Arbroath/Montrose patter: 2 minutes before suffering a massive heart attack former Arbroath F.C. and Montrose F.C. (now officially the worst footie team in Scotland. Congratulations to everyone involved.) gaffer Tommy Campbell was heard to announce: "Fuck me wi'a shovel, I feel pish!"). I got no more to say. Iain McG. ---------------------- Iain McGilp u02nim@abdn.ac.uk +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the reborn Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail "sinister@majordomo.net". To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to "majordomo@majordomo.net". WWW: http://www.majordomo.net/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "jelly-filled danishes" +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+