hello there.... ...well i should be in college i suppose..but hey...its the last day of term and i have no games to bring in... :) ...i suppose i had a kind of spirit ditch too yesterday...it took a detour while on my way to buy cigarettes yesterday evening and walked all around the little places i used to go when i was younger...all the little bushes and holes that you forget when you stop playing around in the mud on lighter evenings...i think you can probably see where this is going....i got to this lake called plumbers pit (no,i have no idea why it is called this...perhaps plumbers stood in a big hole in days of yore and dicussed plungers)...but unsuprisingly it wasnt a lake anymore....not that it had been concreted over or anything...but it now just seemed like a bigger than average pond...as a child this thing was huge,the biggest notable landmark until at least the post office....i know these are cliches but its true that we climbed trees,looked for randy toads, fished and generally mucked about down there...admittidley it wasnt all golden summer evenings and cherub-like schoolkids with catapults....as i got older it became a bountiful hunting ground for pervy twelve year olds looking for discarded 'specialist' magazines and many a minor act of arson and vandalism was commited around its waters...on cold evenings you could go and warm yourself on the acrid black smoke of a plastics fire..you just had to watch out for aerosol can explosions....but i never notcied the ugly great factories that towered over the trees...and i never realised that the whole bloody place wasnt a natural lake at all...it was just a gravel pit filled in so people moving into new houses after the war would have somwhere to go on a sunday afternoon..i'm guessing a bit here but the trees looked just a little tooo perfectly arranged to be naturally grown....there were still fishing spots there but i'm 75% there were no fish left....so i just sat down and smoked and turned up my walkman to drown out the rumble of the next door industrial estate and felt generally shit...i suppose its going to be the same for every kid that grows up around it...it'll seem huge and exciting until you reach a certain age and forget how to be a kid anymore...i suppose i should have known really..i hadnt been there for a good couple of years and i knew it wouldnt look quite as big and interesting anymore...but it just kind of got to me....how i lost *it* so quickly...how i can never look at anything in the same way as i used to....these are probably obvious things i'm saying and these all comes across as pretentious guff....but i had to write it down.....ah bollocks...i was feeling better this morning too.... ta ta.... PS: i got home in time to see who shot phil mitchell..what a dissapointment it was...i was convinced it was big ron.... __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Get email at your own domain with Yahoo! Mail. http://personal.mail.yahoo.com/ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "peculiarly deranged fanbase" +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "frighteningly named Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +-+ Nee, nee mun pish, chan pai dee kwa +-+ +-------------------------------------------------------------------------+