i feel like rambling on and on and on incessantly, elaborating to no end about my troubles; digressing about my sorrows; detailing the horrors. but i won't. i will simply make generic, blind statements that we can all enjoy. listen: i think love is an illusion. somebody tell me i'm wrong. actually, i know i'm wrong. but sometimes i think a group of middle aged, fabulously well-to-do men in a white walled room, cold and sterile, came up with such a premonition: love. and they spread this ill conceived notion upon the rest of us, making those of us not privy to its most intimate nuances feel slightly worthless and unusable. just a theory, you see. listen: young girls are so brutal. they are. there are young girls on this list. you should be ashamed of breaking my heart every 2-6 months. like a clock! listen: i don't think god is dead. i think he's out of the office at the moment; he got caught in traffic on the way back to the office. and he's got incredible road rage. look out. listen: i think that these are precious times. everyone, run outside right now and breath the autumn air. it sounds really inane: cheesy, even. it's not. i promise. and i've never lied to you. never ever ever ever concentrate on the future. just worry about where you are. listen: i believe in love. i believe it's out there. it's no myth. i know it isn't. a brief question: does anyone have a love/hate relationship with the mysterious crush? i know i've beaten this issue to a cruel and unusual death on this list through the years, but i feel as though i've dedicated enough time to the issue that i deserve an explanation. why do i love and hate being totally infatuated with a mysterious, young, lovely girl at the same time? is it the sickness upon waking up, knowing she's waking up too? that she, like me, is incredibly normal? through my years of heartbreak i have always put those objects of affection on unnecessary pedestals: i pretty much took myself out of the running as soon as anything started. now, if we both brush our teeth, put on our pjs, and read before bed, are we not the same? things to contemplate. if anyone has any answers, i will next time, post about b&s. i think. i have stuff to say. not meant to be a pity post, but that's what it is, isn't it? very sorry, don't flog me xxoo blake the nerdy shy-eyed pacifist http://members.tripod.com/nucleartrout +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ +---+ Brought to you by the undead Sinister mailing list +---+ To send to the list mail sinister@missprint.org. To unsubscribe send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to majordomo@missprint.org. WWW: http://www.missprint.org/sinister +-+ "legion of bedroom saddo devotees" "tech-heads and students" +-+ +-+ "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list" +-+ +-+ "sinsietr is a bit freaky" - stuart david, looper +-+ +-+ "pasty-faced vegan geeks... and we LOST!" - NME April 2000 +-+ +-+ "peculiarly deranged fanbase" "frighteningly named +-+ +-+ Sinister List organisation" - NME May 2000 +-+ +----------------------------------------------------------------------+