Sinister: My flatmate, the celebrity

[Robert McTaggart]

On Wed, 10 Dec 1997 12:43:50 GMT, Cairns wrote:

>#1 - visit Vinyl Exchange and annoy Julian.

Now this is interesting...

>       Not just because it really is the swankiest plastic emporium 
>in the North (apart from Picadilly), but because Julian, the Smile 
>guy, works there sometimes.
>       He'll probably be downstairs, smoking and filing U2 albums or 
>something, looking grumpy.  When you go in, you've got to ask him 
>whether they've got 'Tigermilk', upon which he will smile and say: 
>"Ha ha ha, no, but, actually, I have a copy, of my very own, on 
>vinyl, it really is superb, I've had it ages." He enjoys saying this, 
>BUT, if every other fool in there asks him the same question and then 
>giggles, he'll start to get paranoid, which'll be really funny. Okay, 
>maybe it won't, but at least I've shown some initiative.
>Also, he hates students, so go on about your course and cheap booze 
>in unions and that'll be cool, too. Actually don't, this is cruel, 
>'cos Julian's a top bloke and once let us sleep on his floor. In fact 
>this whole idea sucks. Grrrrrr.

No, it doesn't suck, and I won't tell him a thing.  When did you sleep
on his floor.  Was I there?  Who the hell are you?  Who's been
sleeping on my floor that I don't know about?  I'm frightened and I
want my mum.

>Finally, did anyone else laugh at Capt. Bob Stanley talking about 
>Marianne Faithful on 'Brit Girls' on Saturday.

It was baroque wasn't it?

Places to go:  Cafe Pop (Oldham St) for 'convivial' surroundings,
chocalate fudge cake from the Polish bakery and cheese on toast that
rules like a bad mutha.  Goldmine Records (Shambles Square) for
Northern Soul goodies and Piccadilly Records for Laura's radiant
smile, Martin's saucy good looks, Andrew's infectious enthusiasm and
Daryl's abuse about football.  Actually forget the last one - he's an
evil red disgrace and he smells.  Of poo.  Kingbee Records in Chorlton
for second-hand bargains.  Errr....Marks and Spencer's where you can
make bad jokes about turning tables round.  Night and Day is a nice
place to drink.  So is Corbiere's, when it's quiet, but I can never
remember what road it's on.  Behind the Royal Exchange.  Maine Road
for a beautiful religious experience.  Don't go to Old Trafford unless
you want to make Munich jokes and imitate the cockney accents of the
punters.  Actually they'll all be at home in Surbiton watching it on
TV.  Bastards.

Love Tag
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