Sinister: lonely girls make good lovers

[Martin Horsfield]

Listees,

Just as the list was threatening to get dull, it's good to see you all
addressing the big issues with such gusto (sex, religion, lame 80s
movies). I'm especially pleased that my CS Lewis post provoked such
reaction. Perhaps one day I shall be a man of influence on this list,
like those they call the 'Duke', 'Candarel', 'Honey' or, indeed,
'Trousers'.

I'm writing after one of those rare nights in London when magic truly
happened. I had arranged to go and see Dan Penn with Matinee Michael
(who you are all yet to meet - he distrusts this list business) but when
we got to the Borderline, the sold-out signs were up.

Naturally we repaired to the Pillars of Hercules to drown our sorrows in
a lake of Marston's Pedigree and, just as we took our spot at the bar,
two women came in. They knew all the bar staff and from our
eavesdropping, we worked out that they were from the Borderline.
Converstation was struck up, Matinee were mentioned, my Belle and
Sebastian button was noticed and immediately one of the women was
straight onto her mobile phone wangling us onto the paid guestlist.

(She also told us to hang on till after the show because MC Tunes was
doing some live toasting in the club. We didn't take her up on that
particular offer.)

Anyway, Dan Penn and Spooner Oldham will live long in my heart as one of
the best nights of live music I've ever seen. The atmosphere was like a
church. 200 people were completely silent until the end of each song
when everyone was smiling and hugging. I counted three of us in tears
near the front (I was especially susceptible during 'You Tear Me Up' and
'Old Folks'.) Penn, not content with writing 'I'm Your Puppet', 'Do
Right Woman/Man' and 'Dark End Of The Street' has a warm, wise voice and
a dry humour, while Oldham supplies all the harmonies and Chris Geddes-
style Wurlitzer licks.

Among those present were Beth Orton, 'Merton' Mick Talbot, Frank
Skinner, Delia from Mambo Taxi/every band in London, Jason Pierce, the
bloke out of The Rockingbirds and Bobby Gillespie who I hugged just
after 'Dark End...', just saying 'brilliant, brilliant' to each other.

I was emotionally drained and Matinee Mike received something of a
country baptising himself. After all that, I got talking to a girl from
Leeds on the Tube and ended up going about 10 stops out of my way,
chaperoning her to Tufnell Park, raving about Dan Pen and receiving a
hug, a kiss and her phone number for my troubles.

To the lonely girl of a few days back, looking for some music to ease
her through her break-up: remember you can't just take this stuff like a
tincture. You have to disregard everything your parents, your
boyfriends, your dumb peers or the church ever told you. As Terry
Callier sings 'Pretty music, when you hear it/keep on trying to get near
it/a little rhythm for your spirit' etc etc. Take your cues from those
who speak right to your heart and you won't go far wrong.

Martin Horsfield, ordinary Joe 
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