Sinister: Happiness is a Warm Mum

[PJMiller]

Not only did my mother buy me a copy of Melody Maker, she read it as
well. She says it lost her a bit at times, but Master Stuart comes
across as a nice young man. Pah! Not very interesting! I hear you
snarl. But it gave me a great idea - why not organise a sinister
parental picnic? All our mums and dads could get together and talk
about how disappointed they are to have produced poor quality fighters
and if we ask really nicely perhaps Stuart's dad, Mister Murdoch,
could come along and tell a few of his mini-skirt jokes. Oh well, it's
only a thought. Keith, your mum could organise it, Paul's dad'll
provide the chocolate fingers and Trousers senoir could give a talk
about his role as an enormous sideburn in "Here We Go Round the
Mulberry Bush".

Tag, I tried to send you a message of love this morning, but it keeps
getting rejected. Have you farted? I can't send it via the list
because it consists of a loosely strung together torrent of insults.

Seeing as I don't live in Britain or America I went to France this
afternoon to see if I could start a  big fight between the French and
Spanish listees, but I couldn't find anything controversial. Well, I
did see three people widdling in the street in a very short space of
time. Do all French people urinate whenever and wherever the urge
takes them? I went on a boat. Boats rock.

My gigantic package from Jeepster has arrived, but due to my
inexplicable habit of giving people half my old address and half my
new address, it's gone to my mother-in-law's. I can't wait to pore
over the lyrics in search of the meaning of the rabbits versus clotted
cream debate. I know where there's some rabbits in a cage. I think
they're going to end up inside someone's fat belly.

Megan, I'm strictly a Sarah man, but I quite like your idea, in a
funny sort of way. Speaking of which, they were playing "Je t'aime" in
the supermarket again. I find it quite an arousing song in public,
thus enabling me to drive my shopping trolly whilst leaving both hands
free to grab loads of goodies. Then I pay for them in rumpy-pumpy.

I'm outta here for the time being,

Sister Disco

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