Sinister: Pooey day

[Pishco at xxx.com]

Hallo bell-end sebastian fans I am new I also like this band very much too
.they 'rock' man. Hi  to all my buddies from 'the shopping trolleys' list you
guys are so cool.
anyway I am looking today at all you ugly kids' photos on the site when I say
wow! who is this beautiful example of aqualine loveliness 'funkiseb'? He
orgasms me big time, and tingles my nose cavetiessohfucKIT.

Hi popkids. I just thought I'd pop in and say merrybastardchristmas to you
all. (And try and notch up a crush point or two under an assumed name of
course.)
      This is a pooey day. 
1) Michael Aspall brought his big red book round to my office, but it wasn't
for me. 
2) Everyone I work with has gone to get pissed, network, eat a lot, and be on
telly, but they wouldn't let me on the bus.
3) The girl I love, who said she loved me,hated me all along. 
4) She loves my flatmate
5)  I gave up smoking today 
6)  I have no food
7)  I gave up smoking today 
       What a deeply morbid time of year this is. The constant wind steals
your breath and whips your skin, the cold gently kills you, limb by limb, and
the freezing river shines blacker than ever under every bridge.

             Just the time for a tea party!
Pubs too crowded? Picnics out of the question? Parties just too socially
demanding?

TEA!
CAKE!
(FINE) WINES!

You know I'm right.
No details as yet, but I'm working on it. Funkyseb's Winterval Cakeathon...
Rah!
All invited. Bring a cake and/or wine. I shall provide tea. Candles! Open
fires! Muffins. Crumpets! Hands up who thinks this is a fab idea!
And it's all mine, not even slightly Lady P's. 
Uh huh. 
My idea.
I am the Cake King.
Anyway, e mail me if you're interested, kids. Suggest a date.

This e mail's poo but I've no idea what you're talking about on the list so I
can't join in in any detail.
Actually, I'll make a guess:
<<...ooh isn't the m****** m*****  horrid? david and katrina can you lock up
struan in your Kensal Road dungeon so no one can take pictures of him or ask
him if he likes cake except us listees?>>
<<i hate that sell-out poorag M****** M**** they're just trying to save their
jobs by putting a big pop band on the front page.>>
<<dear honey, have you seen that MM poo? How's the list going to cope with all
the new fans? I mean literally dozens  of people must have read that paper
last week.

See some of you at the xmas party on friday. I hope you've all found
presents:-)
byebye
seb

**************P*I*S*H***************

If you enjoyed this e mail feel free to reward the author with packets of
cigarettes or little tiny dairy milk bars. Postal address availiable on
application
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