Sinister: doctor doctor I think i'm in belle and sebastian.

[susannah]

Dear tortured , sensitive Sinisterines

      I so look forward to the Monday poem, its the highlight of my dull week,
and last week Tag's horoscope came as such a surprise I wet myself with glee.
In view of these regular features I propose to instigate a Sinister problem
page.
Initially i thought of asking that upright pillar of society Mister Murdoch to
become an agony uncle, as I'm sure he would be able to give me some adult
guidance and steer me from behind.
The problem I wanted to put to him was a simple one but it troubled me
nonetheless:

Dear Stu, I am experiencing a difficulty with my castanets and I have heard you
are now a flamenco expert so maybe you can help?
The problem is, I only have one and it won't clack. 
Can I clack it against yours?
Yours hopefully, Susannah.

However on second thoughts I conceded that he would probably think it a
piss-take so have nobly taken the burden of responsibility upon mysellf and will
be running a weekly agony slot. Please mail me with your problems, the more
intimate and medical the better, and I will endeavor to provide an appropriate
answer in my weekly column. Anything really personal I will of course treat in
the strictest confidence, although I'll mail them immediately to Tag so he can
have a laugh too.

Susannah.

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