Sinister: Why do bus stories always come in threes?

[Neil Dewhurst]

Good to see bus stories abounding in the digest these days, although I would
say that any general public transport anecdote is worth its weight in travel
passes - at least.  My favourite bus story is this: Some beautiful people
with immaculate make-up are travelling on a bus, when a mad guy pretending
to be a ham actor tells them there's a device on board which will make a
large bang-like noise if the speed of the bus ever dips below, say, fifty
miles per hour.  Luckily there's a guy on board who used to be in a band.
Using his in-depth knowledge of history, which he acquired while not at
military school, he decides the device is bogus, and cunningly defuses it
using his huge mental capacity and then slows the bus with his swollen
fore-head and some well-delivered quips.  Sadly, Sandra Bullock, who for
some reason is driving the bus, survives.

I thought I might try and get it turned into a film.  I'll call it Velocity.

---------

I have a quick Monday poem comment: If I ever manage to find it, I shall
post what I commonly refer to as Now that's what I call the best poem in the
world ever(tm).  It's called "A poem which ends with the line 'Vaseline Bert
and the slinky ox" and it was written by, erm, me actually last year.  I
asked my then girlfriend to give me a phrase which would form the last line
of a poem, and being twisted that was what she came up with.  I duly
obliged, and if you're looking for praise for it, all I can tell you is that
her father (who is a very respected playwright) said, having read it, that
it showed "a love of the language".

---------

Weejay was confused and needed help, so he said...

		But the point of this was... After none of you offered to do
me a Nick Drake tape I set out to look in the proper shops. They all seem to
have the same four albums, including one calling itself an introduction or
something, with 'blue' in the title. Anyway, I forget which the others were,
but the same 4 kept coming up and at 8.99 I can only afford one to start off
with, so which would you lot reccomend...?

If you can't decide, you could always start off with Way to Blue or Heaven
in A Wild Flower, two compilations covering the three main albums Pink Moon,
Five Leaves Left and Bryter Layter.  If you don't want to shell out for
either of those two, I'd happily make up a tape for you goddamit, and it'd
be better than either.

If anyone on the list lives in Birmingham (England), they may just be able
to do me a favour...please email me privately if you don't mind spending
five minutes in the centre of town just for me.  I thank you.

Neil
Xxxx
Xxx
Xx
x
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
      +---+  Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list  +---+
 To send to the list please mail "sinister at majordomo.net". To unsubscribe
   send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to
 "majordomo at majordomo.net".  For list archives and searching, list rules,
   FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister
          +---+   "legion of bedroom saddo devotees"  +---+
 +-+  "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list"  +-+
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+