Sinister: Mystic Smeg speaks...

[Stuart Gardiner]

Well there I was, minding my own business, perusing the sale section of
our local record emporium this afternoon, when suddenly a freak distortian
in the space-time continuum caused a wormhole to appear. And out of it,
dropped a single CD (what are the chances of that happening?). Much to my
surprise, I discovered that said CD was in fact by everyone's favourite
Scottish popsters, B&S. I was surprised mainly because it turned out to be
a "Best Of" collection from the year 2013. Not having come across this
particular item before (that's the problem with living outside of the big
cities - the shops just don't get these rarer CDs as often), I examined it
more closely.

Of course, as with any album, the first thing I looked at was the
tracklisting. As far as I can remember it, it was:
The State I Am In, TBWTAS, Le Pastie, Paperboat, Modern Rock Song, Rhoda,
Painful Encounter, She's Losing It, LLPJ, Get Me Away From Here, Solitude,
Off-topic, Dylan In The Movies, Summer Wasting (Fatboy Slim remix), Cock
Fun, Carnage Mother F*ck*rs.

I'm not sure if I've got that last one right though.

Now unfortunately I didn't have enough cash on me to buy the album, but it
came with a 'band history' booklet, so I nicked that out of one of the
sleeves, becuase I thought you might be interested in what it had to
say...


"Belle and Sebastian may now be recognised as one of the greatest bands of
all time, but it wasn't always like this. Indeed, they sell far more
records now than they ever did while they were still together, towards the
end of the last century. Partly this is because of the current Acoustica
boom in the music industry, but also because of the catalogue of 
misfortune and misadventure which dogged their career together.

"The founder of the band was reclusive lead singer xvyw, then operating
under his real name of Stuart Murdoch. His early demo tapes were picked up
on by students at Stow College, who each year released a single under the
namer 'Electric Honey Records' as part of their course. In B&S's case
however, there were so many songs ready that they decided to release an
album instead, the legendary Tigermilk, copies of which currently change
hands for over 200,000 ECU. The rest of the band consisted of Stuart's
aquaintances from around Glasgow, and people recruited from the regulars
at the fabled Grosvenor Cafe in the city. The album brought the band onto
national radio on the now defunct Radio 1; and soon after they signed a
deal with Jeepster records of London to release their next album.

"The second (and first widely available) album, If You're Feeling  
Sinister, sold slowly mainly by word-of-mouth recommendations; and in 1997
it was followed by 3 EPs recorded in the Church Hall where the band made
their base. It seems inconceivable now, with Le Pastie... having been
adopted as the national anthem of post-revolutionary Europe, but these EPs
were largely ignored by the record-buying public, with the final 3..6..9..
Seconds Of Light EP being the only one to make it into the Top 40. This
may well have been due to the bands reluctance to talk to the press at
all, for (as we now know) fear that interviewers might discover the truth
about Stuart's gender. Indeed, by the time the 3rd album, The Boy With The
Arab Strap, was released in September 1998 he declined to do any
interviews whatsoever.

"Increasingly at this point, keyboardist Chris Geddes (currently with the
reformed Backstreet Boys) and guitarist Stevie Jackson (who sadly passed
away last year) were becoming spokesmen for the group. It was at this
point that the internal differences in the band first surfaced. Stuart and
cellist / singer Isobel Campbell wanted to take the band into increasingly
precious music, reflecting their own innate shyness (Isobel famously
refused to tour with the band from early 1999 as she couldn't face the
large crowds the band were attracting, and so does not appear on the live
rendition of Paper Boat included here, recorded at the Hollywood Bowl in
June 1999). Meanwhile other members of the band were determined to shake
of the band's twee image. The tension forced Chris back on the alcohol,
which he had vowed to give up after being forced to take a bucket on stage
because of a particularly bad hangover at one early gig. It also led to
trumpeter Mick Cooke being thrown out of the band after being arrested for
indecent behaviour during a show in Memphis, Tenessee for proving
whilst high on drugs that he was indeed being a true Scotsman in his kilt.

"Of course the band's ever-expanding obsessional fanbase know nothing
about this at the time, and their insatiable demand for new material led
the band to release 4 more EPs over the next year. However the standard of
material dropped as the band could no longer keep up with demands placed
on them by the record company. Only the acknowledged classic Off-topic,
ironically all about fans on an email list dedicated to the band, has
stood the test of time. All-too aware of this was bassist Stuart David,
who walked out of the band in the Autumn of that year, and subsequently
found far greater commercial success in his solo career under the
pseudonym 'Looper'; but not before delivering the stinging rebuke 'They
used to be my friends, but now it's just pish'.

"The 6 remaining members completed the band's final album, Compassion For
Giraffes, in December 1999; their saddest work by far, reflecting the
maudlin state of them at the time. It went straight into the Top 5 on its
release, and it appeared to all the world that huge mainstream success was
just around the corner. But little did the public know just how strained
relations within the band had become. Drummer Richard Colburn's messy
relationship with violinist Sarah Martin only made things worse. The band
were jealous of the success (and subsequent attention from the record
company) of label-mates Snow Patrol, and the lengthy legal battle when the
label tried to rerelease Tigermilk, but were prevented from doing so when
David Essex sued the band for plagiarism on the song Mary Jo, was the
final straw. The band finally split on 30 June 2000, the day after their
ill-tempered headline slot at the Glastonbury Festival.

It could have been a brilliant career...

"Stuart David continues to enjoy success with Looper, whose 10th album
will
be out in the new year.
Sarah Martin spent two profitable years playing with the Corrs, and now
lives in California.
Isobel Campbell currently runs an old people's home in Falkirk.
Richard Colburn is no longer in the music industry, but makes his living
working for a top accountancy firm.
Mick Cooke hosts his own TV chatshow on BBC1 every Saturday night.
Stuart Murdoch, or as he prefers to be known now xvyw, is currently living
in a monastery in Tibet."


Big Stu

+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
      +---+  Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list  +---+
 To send to the list please mail "sinister at majordomo.net". To unsubscribe
   send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to
 "majordomo at majordomo.net".  For list archives and searching, list rules,
   FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister
          +---+   "legion of bedroom saddo devotees"  +---+
 +-+  "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list"  +-+
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+