Sinister: why me

[yellow submarine]

why is everyone so hung up on having a crush?

   "why is nobody crushing on me?"

blah blah blah, is that all that is important in life, finding someone?  
sorry for my rather dark attitude, it's my current mood.

does everyone on the list see their main focus in life to find that one 
person in life to be with?  what is wrong with being alone?  why does 
everyone try and set me up, when i don't want to be?  what is wrong with 
enjoying your isolation?  not wanting to go to some club every saturday 
night to watch druken slobs attempt to pick up the first girl that looks 
at them? 

does anyone else feel completely out of place in this world?  kind of 
hate everyone and everything  but i love them all the same?  anyone read 
A Long Days Journey into Night?  one character feels he would have been 
much more successful being something else, just not a human being.  i 
agree.  

like that interpretation of Fox in the Snow.  has anyone found a way to 
escape?  i've travelled all over the world and attempted to get away but 
it is impossible.  momentarily you can escape, but reality always sneaks 
back in.  

is it possible to find your soulmate?  i think that is what my troubles 
are.  if there is truely only one person out there for each of us, what 
is the likely hood that that person will be plunked down in the same 
city as you, when there are 6 billion people in this world?  seems 
impossible.  do you all settle for less?  

and i don't want to go to clubs anymore, all i want to do is sit in my 
room and cuddle my cat, the only one who understands me.  i want to get 
piss drunk sometimes and not worry about ending up in some louts bed the 
next morning. i want to sit alone in the park reading or go to the 
movies by myself.  i want to live my life happily but that doesn't seem 
to be happening.  

oh i get into these moods sometimes.  more often than not recently.  i 
can't believe that anyone is still reading this.  i don't know why i 
wrote.  i'll regret this as soon as i hit send. 

why can't i be happy being alone, and why isn't that okay with everyone 
else?  not everyone is meant for someone.  

why do i try..........



______________________________________________________
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
      +---+  Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list  +---+
 To send to the list please mail "sinister at majordomo.net". To unsubscribe
   send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to
 "majordomo at majordomo.net".  For list archives and searching, list rules,
   FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister
          +---+   "legion of bedroom saddo devotees"  +---+
 +-+  "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list"  +-+
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+