Sinister: PLEASE READ: message from list owner

[Honey]

I'm sorry this mail is somewhat lacking in humour but you'll have
heard all is not well in Honeyland.  So some points you have no
excuse but to read and I will assume you all have.

First off, stop indulging in this pointless UK/US thread - and stop
mailing the list to stop people talking about it.  When I left on
what I thought was a one week holiday (M.E.'s like that :), I told
you two things: (a) be good, and (b) don't mail the list and tell
other how to behave.  It's no-one's job to do (b) but mine, and some
people with the sweetest of intentions have done so, understandably
in my absence, but I'm afraid it just propagates the problem and
causes more discussion.  No-one's allowed to argue with me :)

If you think someone's being stupid ignore them, they'll hang
themselves publically that way - we've seen it several times already.
It's like not talking to the pissed man at the party with the silly
hat on who keeps dropping peanuts and asking people if they know who
invented tarmac - you just don't reply and eventually he feels silly
and goes home.  See?  And if he's REALLY bad he just gets chucked
out, but you don't have to worry about that.  You're supposed to be
just having fun and dancing nude on the coffee table.  I've been
having funny dreams lately.

As for people who aren't doing (a), or people who continue to fan the
flames, or people who are personally abusive in ANY way, retaliation
being NO excuse: well, the way I feel just now and the time I have to
do any of this is so short, that I'll have no hesitation in cutting
you off from Sinister with no court of appeal, permanently, and if it
gets sillier, shutting down the list.  I'm sorry to all you good
people out there, who vastly outnumber the people with big mouths and
smaller hearts, but it's fairly clear to me who's helping and who
hindering the prospects of this mailing list, and it should be clear
to everyone else.  You (plural) have to think when you mail something
to 700 people and be careful about what it will mean to them - if you
don't agree, then this list isn't for you and you can always go and
make your own.  So not one WORD more about this UK/US thing please,
or about talking ABOUT it - just stop it now.

When I left I also asked you to (c) think before you post.  Some
people are and some aren't and I'll repeat that now.  But please
don't go talking about this on the list - I know how to run a mailing
list by now, and as I've said a million times, everyone else's job on
this list is just to play in the sandpit and be good; and add
something of themselves and their lives to what they post.  Being
funny helps too.

And be warned that on a short and feeble fuse I will take seriously
any young gun who thinks he or she can walk in and run all over this
list. I'm not referring to anyone in particular here, so please don't
anyone take offence; I suppose I'm just saying - don't offend some
wonderful friends of mine who've been here since the beginning of the
list and made it what it is.  If you're new you're very welcome, but
please learn how wonderfully self-regulating this list can be from
the old-timers, and shhs a little if you find yourself posting more
than once a day.  And add CONTENT to your posts.  And I'm a little
biased towards anyone who gives a friend of mine a hard time just now
(flash of claws, grrr) - put it down to the illness.

I'm sorry this is a mean sounding email.  Lots of people behind the
scenes have been so kind and I've got cards and emails from lots of
you sweet things - no-one's sent me any underwear yet but I'm still
hopeful.  But if you did ask Michele for my address, please don't
just turn up naked on the doorstep - I'm prone to dizziness.  And I
haven't replied to all the nice people yet who have sent me things:
please take this email as a huge thank you just now, and I will mail
people as time allows and things get better.  Things SHOULD get
better now as Linda's back to make cups of tea, so I'm not relying on
missions of mercy from her Mum and two useless, selfish cats who
don't know how to work a tin-opener.

Finally you need to just be happy bunnies - moaning about the list ON
the list does no good and just lowers the tone further.  Smile and
bounce around.  That's an order :)  Oh and you could all do with
following the shining example of some on this list, meeting a fellow
list member (either gender will do, stop being picky), whipping off
your clothes and further putting up the number of sordid Sinister
liaisons that I'm filling in on my wallchart, and that make me very
proud.  Always the bridesmaid, me.

That's it for now, I'm returning to my quilt.  Please don't email me
asking for things, as you won't get a reply, probably, but by all
means send me non-returnable emails.  You might not hear from me for
a bit on the list I'm afraid as things are distinctly wobbly, unless
of course you're bad in which case everything might go suddenly
blank; but remember I'm watching you all like a hawk.  A sexy hawk
with a sniffle.

bye bye for now, chums, and let's hope we can keep this thing going,
honey xxx

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