Sinister: Alex Higgins called me a c*nt

[Kevan Cooke]

Hello All,

Francoise Hardy is indeed worth a listen.

A lot of the French singers from the sixties who are growing in popularity
these days have a kind of kitsch easy listening appeal, but Francoise Hardy's
folky pop songs are just achingly beautiful.

My main mishearing is in "She's Losing It", and I still prefer my version
which goes "When the first cup of coffee tastes like washing up, She knows
she's losing it".

Who said Lolitapop Dollhouse?  Was that Megan?  Any Japanese pop and/or Momus
references get my wholehearted approval.

Have we stopped talking about cheese now?  I never got to mention Y Fenni
which is a distinctive Welsh cheese made with ale and mustard seeds.

In the interest of furthering smut levels here is the tale of the time when
I met Alex Higgins.  For those who don't follow snooker, Alex Higgins is one
of the finest and most distinguished sportsmen of the last twenty years.
Alternatively he is an offensive drunk who often terrorises the populace of
south Manchester.  Judge for yourselves:

Here I am, having just enjoyed a night out with some friends.  We have caught
the 192 bus back to Levenshulme, and have just stopped off at Farooqs for a
bite to eat.  There is a short drunk slumped over the counter giving the staff
a torrent of abuse.  For no apparent reason he turns around, looks at myself
and my friends and says "You're all clever c*nts", then turns his attentions
back to the staff again.  Yes, it's the former snooker world champion himself.

Next he hails a taxi by staggering out of Farooqs and into the middle of the
road where he stops and sways from side to side.  When a taxi does stop he
comes back in to collect his food, and asks us if we want to share the taxi
with him.  We decline his kind offer and he disappears into the night.

Next week: I turned down dinner with Bernard Hill

Kevan
The Bourgeois Slug


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