Sinister: Go on, put it in your mouth

[Warrander John - FML]

Bonjour,

French pop, eh? Educational. Anyway, if there's anybody out there
in the North of England who doesn't want to go to a really indie club
then Smile's on every week and it's not very indie. And if you didn't
come last week cos you thought you might be a bit intimidated by
the global celebrity on the decks, then this week it's back to the usual
losers so why not pop along and feel good about yourself. We
promise not to play any Field Mice and in fact we have a special
three-pronged attack for anyone who requests that kind of nonsense.
Julian punches them, Emma pours petrol over them and I throw the
match. Quite affective we find.

Petula greeted me thus:

>Hello John, we meet at last.

Hello to you too, my dear. I hear you're going to cook me a meal?
You'd better be good at it. I've got quite high standards you know.

Then she forgave me and filled a gap in my pop knowledge:

>I'll forgive you for the lingerie comments and
>tell you a bit more about those songs. They hail from the (bootleg)
Ultra
>Chicks series: "Filles in the Garage" and "Lolita Ya-Yas". Not only are
they
>full of fantastic pop, but if you own actual copies they make you look
>really cool as well. Next time you have a party and when the music boys
do
>the inevitable flip through your records, put them straight in front
and
>they'll get really jealous.

Such a nice, kind girl. Very clean. Anyway, I think having these things
on tape is much more beneficial than having the originals. Not only can
you impress people with you're fantastic pop selections when they come
round to your house. You can seamlessly display what hip and groovy
friends you have too.

And er, smut? Well I did hold big JB's hand in central Manchester last
night. We thought we were being subversive but I think we just looked
like a pair of poofters.

Why do people apologise for no B&S content? It never bothers me.

Au Revoir good people.
And bad people too.

Love...John
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