Sinister: I am behind You, I am a Tiger!

[PJMiller]

Wasn't that an Abba song? I think so. Anyway, that is neither saucy nor
irrelevant. And neither is this:

Tag wrote:

(Erlend, a dead ringer for Dennis Pennis, did an impromptu impression of
Isaac Hayes in "South Park")

One or two of you might remember that I am a huge Isaac Hayes fan, mainly
because he makes me feel good about balding. Although Uncle Isaac was very
popular until the late(ish) seventies ("I'm gonna have another go at
disco!"), until recently he has been _fairly_ obscure and, quite frankly,
unavailable in Woolies. This is the second time in recent weeks I have seen
reference to Black Moses (as he is known to his fans) in connection with
something called "South Park". I don't know what "South Park" is, and if I'm
perfectly honest, I don't bloody want to either. But what I do need to know
is whether it will be necessary for me to disown Isaac Hayes and claim that
I liked him much more when he was bankrupt? That'll teach me to like people
who aren't dead!

Gerard the sound man, eh? Zat must 'av bin good. I was sure it was going to
have been (what a bizarre grammatical spaghetti junction!) Ciara. Have you
managed to subscribe properly yet? If not, ignore me.

Adrian Evans admitted:

Just bought NME.

Where did you buy it from, Adrian? I hope it was an independent outlet, not
John Menzies or WHSmiths.

News In Brief : Belle & Sebastian, Primal Scream, The Chemical Brothers,
Arab Strap and The Verve are among artists featured on the soundtrack of The
Acid House...blah blah blah The soundtrack....features four previously
unreleased songs from.......Belle and Sebastian (Floral Graffitti).....Que
????

Don't worry kids, Uncle Pete is here to save the day. It's that film
festival time of year again, and on Saturday night I shall be donning my
gladdest rags to go and see "The Acid House", starring Stuart Murdoch as a
troubled troubador in search of an english cock cage with magical powers.
I'm not sure, but I'm hoping it's not out yet in the rest of the civilised
world, so I'll be able to gloat and not tell anybody anything about it.

Mark Cassarato wrote:

I'm also concerned about my New York trip now. I go and buy the bloody
tickets, then Peter reveals all about the hundreds of monsters roaming
the streets! Belle and Sebastian are a band who must have literally
dozens of fans unwilling to be eaten by dinosaurs - you'd have thought
they would have been thoughtful enough to play somewhere where this
wasn't an issue

You're taking this matter very lately, Mark. If you'd done your homework you
would have known that those footprints are far too big to have come from a
dinosaur trapped in a time warp. Besides, B&S aren't playing in Madison
Square Gardens yet, although I for one CAN'T WAIT UNTIL THEY DO!

Keith wrote:

It was like 14.99 in Fopp, and 11.99 in HMV.

Fopp's wierd, isn't it? They have huge piles of Goldie double albums for a
fiver, and "The Best Dressed Chicken in Town" by Doctor Alimantado for
16.99! Guess which one I wanted? In fact, during my latest survey of UK
record outlets, I noticed that it was dead easy to find crap, but dead hard
to find what you want at a reasonable price. I have a feeling it's the same
throughout the world. Depends what you're after I suppose. I also noticed
that formerly tiny indie shops are turning into imitation HMVs by the
barrel-load,  with those bloody stupid display cases out front. Leicester's
full of 'em. Let's face it, the only good record shop in the world,
following the demise of Ear Ere, is Ultima Thule, and they stock bollocks. I
hate record shops, even the good ones. I mean one.

Sir Anthony H!O!P!kins is coming to the film festival.

Another thing I hate is "listening posts". Bleeurgh! Germs! You've got the
lurgy if you've used one. The best record shop ever was Swordfish records in
Brum. It was tiny and cramped and all the CDs were displayed on shelves,
like in somebody's house, so it was really difficult to see what they were,
and they had the Manson Family album in the window and the staff were
obviously instructed to laugh at the customers, regardless of what they
bought, in my case a splendid Sun Ra compilation. I'm not surprised they
laughed really. So did my dad. I think I've told this story before.

This once magnificent cornerstone of Birmingham cultural life is no more. Or
else it has moved.

I realise that all of the above is complete crap, but no way am I deleting
it now.

Thank you,

Peter

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