Sinister: Bowlie Diary

[susannah]

Friday 23 September

9st 2 (v. bloody good excluding the fact I ate packed lunch before the bus had
set off), alcohol units 14 (dreadful but can only get worse), cigarettes 0
(don't smoke), calories 3100 ( poor) number of bands seen 2, improper thoughts
about Stuart Murdoch 8

5 p.m. Oh God, why am I so unattractive? Cannot believe I convinced myself I was
spending the entire weekend selling merchandise and watching bands when in fact
I was on permanent pulling standby.
Why hasn't anyone chatted me up yet? why? whats wrong with me?
Must centre myself more. Will ask Trousers about appropriate self-help book,
possible Eastern-religion-based.

Message Board:
FOUND- one pair of black NHS specs
Gay sex in chalet 693
Tom must die

Saturday 24 September

9st 4 (don't know how I can tell cos no scales even in plush AAA chalet),
alcohol units 20(diabolical but can only get worse),
cigarettes 2 passive, calories 5000 (but threw up so effectively 400 approx.)
number of bands seen 2, smutty thoughts about Stuart Murdoch 15 ( exacerbated by
seeing his legs in shorts).

Food consumed today:
3 pieces toast
2 apples
1 chewy cereal bar
6 jaffa cakes
1 bagel
half a tube of Pringles
3 hot doughnuts
slap up meal from plush AAA catering tent
2 veggie burgers from whistlestop burger bar
5 chips from stranger with ketchup
2 packets cheese and onion crisps(slightly soggy as wallowing in beer stained
table)

8am Ugh. Wish I was dead. Am never ever going to drink again for the rest of my
life.

8.30 am Oooh. Could really fancy some chips.

11.30am Badly need water but seems better to keep eyes closed and head
stationary on pillow so as not to disturb bits of machinery and seagulls in
head.

Message Board:
Hayley the lifeguard she suck winky
Fish don't care what time it is
Tom must die

4pm-12am Quite enjoying selling merchandise. Everyone looking at Rod and Emu
T-shirts going 'thats sick!  I'll take three'
Am trying to be friendly and approachable,  cute bloke in newly purchased
ladybug transistor T-shirt eyeing me up totally unsubtley. Suddenly dawns on me
that is not because he fancies me but wants to get served.
Decide to romp in kiddies inflatable playground with boys from Salako instead.
Boys from Salako only interested in throwing me down plastic chute.

Sunday 25 September

10st 8 (probably but can't be sure), alcohol units 27(v. v. poor and totally
evil) cigarettes 0, illegal cigarettes 1, calories 1500(all derived from
alcohol), bands seen 4, improper thoughts about Stuart Murdoch 20 (last day so
have to make the most) number of Salako T-shirts sold 1

3pm wake up with horrible acidic hangover, will never drink again.
Nasty dream about about being forced to listen to the Divine Comedy whilst
everyone else having good time watching Flaming lips.

6pm Bowlie T-shirts totally sold out and people forced into Rod and Emu Tshirts,
even the foreigners.
Have to plead with someone to give me their two and a half days in love with you
badge instead of being handed it by admirer like everybody else.

11pm Nearly cry during Century of fakers but mange to blink back sad girlie
tears by quickly summoning up improper thought about S.M.

Message Board:
Belle and sebastian suck cock
Salako eat monkey ass
TOM MUST DIE 

love you all, Susannah. xxx





















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