Sinister: You say Karl and I say Harpo

[Stuart Gardiner]

The word 'bollocks' is of course derived from the name of the actress
Sandra Bullock, as it aptly describes most of her work. It has been
clinically proven that the only reason people went to see films such as
Speed was in the hope that they'd get to see her in her undies
(colour-coordinated of course). Hence the original title for the Sex
Pistols album, "Never Mind The Bollocks, Get Your Kit Off" (the title was
shortened at the insistence of record company boss Richard Branson, who
claimed he couldn't cope with sentences that long). Quite why Sandra's
family are all named after a small furry British mammal is unclear.

>  Here are the nominees for the best newcomer award:
> 
>  Another Level 
>  Belle & Sebastian 
>  Billie 
>  Cleopatra 
>  Cornershop 
>  Five 
>  Gomez 
>  Hinda Hicks 
>  Propellerheads 
>  Steps 

Nice to see B&S aren't the only bizarre nominee then. What have Cornershop
done this last year? Released a remix of a single which flopped when it
first came out in 1997, and sold a few more copies of their latest (of
several) album which also came out in 1997? And while I'm at it, who the
hell is Hinda Hicks?

So OK, we all know that B&S won't win, and that noone really cares who
wins anyway. But what we all want to know is are they going to show up at
the ceremony? And is Stuart David going to do a Jarvis and run onto the
stage during Robbie Williams' song, waggling his backside and shouting
"This is pish"?

McTaggart, if you don't want your snow, send some of it down here, you
ungrateful swine. I haven't had a decent snowball fight all year. If
anyone wants to invite me to frolic in the snow with them, I'm open to
offers.

Got to go, it's a pound a pint in the our local tonight...

Big Stu



Limerick of the Day:
"There was an old lady from Cork,
 Whose limericks never would rhyme.
 Then one day,
 All of a sudden,
 She found that she couldn't even get the lines the right length either."

+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
      +---+  Brought to you by the Sinister mailing list  +---+
 To send to the list please mail "sinister at majordomo.net". To unsubscribe
   send "unsubscribe sinister" or "unsubscribe sinister-digest" to
 "majordomo at majordomo.net".  For list archives and searching, list rules,
   FAQ, poor jokes etc, see http://www.majordomo.net/sinister
          +---+   "legion of bedroom saddo devotees"  +---+
 +-+  "the cardie wearing biscuit nibbling belle & sebastian list"  +-+
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+