Sinister: flying over canyons.......

[Lesley J Miller]

sometimes i wonder what the non posting people do as well.  i think
shuddering, "i could not POSSIBLY be one of those horrible cliquey people"
the thought of someone being afriad to talk to me because i'm too cool, is
frankly hilarious and laughable.  it's a bit of an ego boost being online
where i'm able to bluster and rant and  rave and act like a badass, when i'm
actully this short nearsighted incredibly nerdy shut-in girl who's never
been kissed.  i guess that's the definition of the sinister list aint' it,
harhar.... all i need now are some NHS specs and a cardigan collection and
i'd be well set.    isn't this a laugh..... i'm acting so funny and retarded
and i dont' care. i feel like i'm in a play or something. sorry i'm having
one of those existentiual moments where everythign seems ridiculous and
surreal.

i got two vvery nice cd's this week.  one is Illusions, Ute Lemper does the
songs of marlene dietrich/edith piaf.  it's GGGGLLLAMOROUS!!!!!!
*siiiiiiiiigggghhhhhh*   the other one is More ABBA gold.  and it's fucking
extreme dude.   it will blow your fucking mind.  it's the shiznit.
especially "head over heels' and "Cassandra"

****Yet Another Installment of
"AS THE BREAD MOLDS"
your favorite dyke-ish soap opera.
when we last met our young protagonist, it was all standard.  girl meets
girl, girl lusts after girl, girl meets bulldyke, bulldyke helps girl get
with girl.  then it started to get weird.  bullke lusts after girl, bulldyke
gropes girl, girls get majorly pissed at bulldyke.   girl number one puts a
black magic spell on bulldyke, after promptly vomiting.  but what of girl
number two--will she escape the nefarious machinations of bulldyke's
perverted obsession, or will living the same apartment complex get to be too
close for comfort?  and what of girl number one's unrequited love for girl
number two? will it rend their friendship at the roots?  adn what of the
vomit inducing thought coursing through her head?  will her witchy spells be
the perfect revenge, or will instant karma gonna get her? tune in next time,
when she'll be out of town anyway and none of it will really matter.

Darling Blakie says:
>tem 2.
female masturbation.  this has always bothered me.  no, not the act itself,
but the fact that every bird that has ever discussed it always denies ever
doing anything.  what a load of pish!  it's similar to denying one's own
>ature for fear of embarassment.

that just irritates me.  like they're SOO above it all.  with guys i guess
it's easier for them to talk about it.  cos their sexuality is pretty much
hanging out for all to see, so it would be dumb to ignore it.    women still
have to deal with all these Puritan issues.   we're way behind, because back
in olden days, they stil thought that women had like no sexual desire, so
they didnt' teach girls anythign about it.  so it's like ingrained in our
culture i guess.    i for one am glad i'm a girl.  and i've discussed this
with ppl.  women are sexually superior.  now dont' go  getting all pissed at
me.  they ARE.   women can do awesome sexual feats that men can't even
touch.  and we have a highly holistic erotic capability.   polymorphous if
you will.    women have the only organ in the human body that is made
exclusively to give pleasant feelings.    what does that tell you?    any
girl who says she don't know, is either lying or weird,they're missing out.
it's practically a crime.   it's your own body you have a right to
understand it.   guys are brought up to enjoy sexuality, girls are taught to
always be polite.  it's rubbish.  (if you don't mind me saying so)    it's
like either extreme, boys are taught to go too far, girls are taught to
pretned they don't have naughty bits.   I know i was.  and i did.   ladies
heed my words, it will mess you up.  i mean, ignoring it will.   Look at me
for pete's sake.  you wanna turn out like me??  i didnt' think so.

Love, i dont' know what to say, i think it's different for everyone, i dont
thin there is any absolute rule in love, except you gotta trust and be
honest with anyone you love, without trust and respect and absolute honesty,
there is no love, only fake acting and pretend feeligns.   whether there is
"one" true love, i think is a moot point.  if there is, you will find them.
it's silly to think "what if my true love is some Sumatran bushman i'll
never meet".  obviously it's only love if you meet the person, love only
happens when you get to know someone, love grows and it's about changing.
or if it's not, then you'll be about flirting, and that' s good for you if
you like it.   i just don't make up rules about it.  attraction and love
involve so many different parts of ourselves.  you can go Jungian and talk
about the shadow, I do.   anima, animus.  gender lines......... who can say?
you change, maybe love can change, or maybe not, maybe you'll find another
one, maybe not, it's all the same.   i tend to think that what happens
happens.    like "wherever you go, there you are"  i dont' see any use
trying to figure it out on a large scale.  i don' think that is like
predestination, it's just that you make one choice after another, and things
roll down like dominoes, and you work with what you get.  maybe in some
other dimension you made another choice.  i'm not really too picky.   my
world view is pretty messed up though, i dont' expect any of this to make
any sense so i'll jsut shut up, cos i dont' realyl like talking about
love.............. i'd rather be experiencing it.

"All is full of love, you just ain't receiving"
--bjork

oh yeah, and ll that chemical garbage, may be true in this world, but you
gotta reach for the stars if you want the real deal know what i mean?
science may be good for you right now, but ain't gonna help you none when
you are flying out there in the cosmic ether, dreaming your own reality.
and no i'm not on acid right now.   there is the pheremone of immediacy,
then there is the something beyond, you have to be strong to see it though.
that's something i believe.

I am a witch,
LJ
(former roomie with carlos castaneda)

*hug hug* to alyssa.......

http://www.members.tripod.com/rebelstrange
"ABBA is the pinnacle of Western civilization." --Stephin Merritt

SAVE MST3K!!!!
http://www.mst3kinfo.com


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