Sinister: The Beer Hunter

[oon]

Mr.Adrian Evans' secretary speaks:

unfortunately, Mr Adrian Evans is not available
to take your baiting right now.  he's gone
and given himself to the beer god i believe.
please leave your messages after the beep.  if
you can't hear it, just send it my way and i'll pass
them on when he comes back.

me, taking off secretary's white fluffy feather mask, speaks:

isn't Star Wars exciting.  what makes it so exciting
was the theatre showed them all night long!  i went
to see the 2am showing in a theatre in a big
shopping mall.  since it's 2am the mall was very
dark and empty.  it's like some shopping mall
horror film.  oh the excitement!  and i've seen
preview of the most scary film in my long and
easily scared life.  it's Thai ghost movie.  it's
coming soon to many theatre near me.  how can
i go to bathroom at night now.  Mr.Chris, if
the above movie has English subtitle i'll send
you the vdo.  guarantee you'll wet your house
with fear.  then you can send it on to Mr Trousers.
to make sure he'll never talk a walk in the park
at night ever again.


Mr Nicky Dastoor wrote:

> I don't think I would like Belle & Sebastian so much
> if they looked rubbish.
> Does anyone else agree?

i watch FTV.  it's not on to ignore those unhinged
flesh and blood marching about mindlessly day and
night.  who'd have thought they can fill 24 hour tv
with just clothes stuff and nudity!  if only the
inbetween bit is not so annoying.  can't someone
tell them to shut up and get on with it?

in other word, i agree.  how could anyone
like them this much if they look like say..
the 70's WHO, for example.  now, Sister Miller
and Mr Watson, think hard and long before
shouting.  can you seriously weep to Mr Murdoch
in those hair singing 'fox in the snow"?


Speaking of Mr Murdoch, i'm sad to find out
i've subconsciously associated him with noodle
in the last few months.  egg noodle with lots
of barbecue porks and shrimp wantons in a
big bowls, to be exact.  whenever he appears
in my dream, he is always surrounded with
those bowls of noodle.  yes!  not just one, but
many bowls of them!  i can't remember dream
actually, only remember that sometimes i woke
up a bit hungry and yearning for egg noodle.
that yearning happened again last week, and
this time i remembered my dream a bit.  so now
i know.  i'm starting to focus and try to associate
him with something else more healthy and has
more fiber.  maybe orange, or banana.  i'll keep
you update on my progress.

i don't know how the below story comes to
pass in my maibox.  but there seems to be
a moral in this story.  so i hope Sir Cliff won't
be too disapproved of it.

Oh Oh! Happy Birthday to the wonderful
Starry Droolz!  May the stars always and forever shine in your eyes!

love,
oon xxx

_______________________________________

Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old
white male, resident of Wilmington, NC,
in a pumpkin patch very late on Friday night.

Davidson will be charged with lewd and lascivious
behavior, public : indecency, and public intoxication
at the County Courthouse on Monday.
The suspect allegedly stated that as he was
passing the pumpkin patch, he decided to stop.
 "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside,
and there was no one around here for miles.  At
least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone
interview from the County jail.

Davidson went on to state that picked out a pumpkin
that he thought was appropriate for his purposes,
cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged
"need".

"I guess  I  was just really into it, you know?"
he commented with evident embarrassment.

In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice
the Wilmington police car approaching and was
unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor
approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said
officer Taylor.
"I walked up to [Davidson] and  he's . . . just working
away at this pumpkin."

"I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but
do you realize that you're doing it with a pumpkin?'
He got real surprised as you would expect and then
looked me straight in the face and said: "A pumpkin?
Damn.... is it midnight already?"

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