Sinister: Short, svelte, hairless legs

[Robert McTaggart]

Dear weird inadequates,

Funny Michael mentioning Ernie Wise, Trousers was making cheap jokes
about the fact that I "left" sinister on the same day as Ernie Wise
rid himself of this mortal coil (that's "died" in Poetryish).  I say
this because he was probably going to point it out to the list and I'm
a vindictive bastard so I want to spoil his fun.  Far from having
"short, fat hairy legs" like Ernie, it has been clinically proven that
I had the kind of legs most women would kill for.  This does have
disadvantages and lead me to being accosted by an Iranian gentlemen
while on holiday (in Italy, not Iran) and told "you are so pale, you
are like a woman and Italian women will never make love to you".  I
cried for a week.

I was given a tape of Belle and Sebastian live at Shepherd's Bush a
while ago and I've only just got around to listening to it, such is
the dizzy whirl of my social life.  It's a fascinating historical
document, and proves us all to be cheerful masochists, just like
Comrade Haines said we were.  Up until that point I thought I was just
having a good time with my mates, regardless of the group's
sub-standard performance, but no...I can clearly hear the massed
Sinister choir screaming "Shit on us Stuart, we're not worthy".

Who's coming out to play with me and Warrander John in Glasgow at
Easter?  There's no Uptight which is a pain, but Wardie assures me
there will be lots of jolly antics, though I'm not going to let
Warrander talk me into playing Mummies and Daddies like I did last
time.

Up yours ugly,

Love tag xx
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