Sinister: left handed six shooters

[Michele Waggner]

Hey Sinisterines...


Fireworks are better than sex because they go off with a bang... REPEATEDLY.


FluffyStarry said something about mamas and shite awhile back, which wasn't
very nice at all.  She said it was Japanese, but I always thought people in
that culture had a bit more respect than to talk bad 'bout their mamas.
Someone outside London, give her a slap upside her haid.

She also talked about Iggy Pop -- I could have run him over last year, in
front
of the Virgin Megastore in NYC.  He was limping though and it wouldn't have
been much sport.  Iggy needs to go in a blaze of glory, run down by
something better than a Nissan.

I see Matt passed on another missive from the Squirrel Liberation Front.
Now
we've done it -- damn.  I knew there was a reason we should have paid the
ransom.  Little Isobel has cracked and turned Patty Hearst on us, no good
will come of this.  Another cd will come of this.  Burning up the airwaves
with rodent protest songs. I suppose she'll start calling herself by some
radical alias like "Nutella de Ville" or something and hold up the local
bank brandishing a semi-automatic oak branch.  No, that is NOT what she has
now, that's a CELLO.

On a related note, I got this sent to me at work.  I was embarrassed to pass
it on, but since we've decended into smut  I guess it might shed a little
light on Isobel's conversion... no, I'm not going to say another thing, just
pass it on...

http://www.texnet.net/golem/nsd/

... and move along.  Briskly.  And say it wasn't me.

I saw Patty Hearst in the local supermarket years back, after she'd been
reintroduced to polite society -- with a vengeance.  I was in the deli line
and heard someone ask for Lorraine cheese in the most plummy finishing
school voice I'd ever head.  I turned around to
smirk and there was Patty/Tanya in her best Gold-Coast matron outfit buying
sandwich fixings.  She looked a lot better in the beret and ammo belt, on
the arm of Commander Cinque.  I sigh for the failed Revolutions, I really
do. Stylistically speaking. Bet she does too.

Enough name dropping.

I was SHOCKED to read today that there is a book called "The Anti-Christ and
a Cup of Tea" which claims Prince Charles is the eponymous devil's spawn.
Not the cup of tea, there's only one handle on the side of a teacup.  Some
other religious case says Satan could do better than that.

I WISH Chris Leonard would come back.  Maybe we could all join hands, click
our heels together and say, "There's no place like home, there's no place
like home," and he'd come back to us like the biblical Prodigal Son. Or a
sheep.  Either that or we kidnap his boss and find him one who is a bit more
cyber-friendly.

Is there a saying, "Better to be hung for a sheep as for a goat?"  Goats are
pretty well... nevermind.  (No Matt, it was NOT me at all, I keep telling
you.)

I can commiserate with Lana and her pole incident.  Once I was walking down
a crowded sidewalk -- looking at nothing off to the side and daydreaming --
and  bumped into an obstacle in my path.  Being mortified and assuming
people thought I was a clumsy oaf, I tried to save myself by rapidly turning
and apologizing profusely -- to a parking meter.  That's when the shoppers
all began to guffaw loudly.  When you do something like that, is it better
to pretend it didn't happen, maintaining your cool and just

Honey mentioned penis-shaped guns.  Ask Honey about penis-shaped cat toys.
Which are NOT at all.   I think Honey has penises on the brain.  Someone
send one along please.

That's more than enough of this.

--michele












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