Sinister: You Could Have Walked Away With �4,000...

[William Messent]

Who dat?

Well I managed to emerge from my self-imposed
hibernation during 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire'
fortnight on Friday and GO OUT! To a NIGHT CLUB! To
have fun with one person I know quite well and a bunch
of people I had never met before in my entire life. It
was a well cheesy club (deffo no B&S on the playlist,
although I think they played Salako. Or was it
Moloko?), and I really went because a good friend of
mine has recently started dancing there (not *that*
type of dancing, it was all above board).

Anyway I realised about halfway through the night that
everyone was ON DRUGS! Apart from me. They all were
'on' 'coke' and 'ecstasy' like I thought only happened
on 'telly'. Are they stoners? I don't know. When the
penny dropped and I realised why I was the only one
drinking, I managed to resist my impulse to spit my
beer out in a well-known comedy style and shout "But
that's illegal!" I sort of wish I'd done it now.

I saw the DKNY girl the other day. She came round to
mine and told me to vote for 'Gregory's Girl' in some
film poll or other, but I'm not sure which poll she
meant. I think she'd been drinking. Anyway, I've never
seen 'Gregory's Girl'. I'm more of a 'Turner & Hooch'
man.

I made a right nob of myself in the bookies on
Saturday. Because the BBC were showing the
Scotland-England game at 4:00, I assumed it kicked off
at that time. I went into William Hill at about 2:45,
spent a good quarter of an hour filling out the
betting sheet, then sauntered up to the counter only
to be looked at blankly and told that the game had
kicked off at 2:00 and it was half-time. Arses.

Somebody came up with a sweary title for the new B&S
LP recently and I liked it. But then I always like
songs with cursing in them. I like it when Elliott
Smith swears on 'XO' and when Stuart sings 'No-one
likes a smart-arse' on 'I Know Where The Summer Goes'.
And I giggled all the way through my new Ol' Dirty
Bastard LP. If I ever release a greatest hits album in
my life I hereby vow to call it 'Beerish Hits'. And if
any members of Belle and Sebastian are reading this,
I've got a copyright on that bastard, OK?

My lawyers are watching,

Love Will x


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