Sinister: I Smell A Hippy

[William Messent]

Yo.

TIME-MANAGEMENT SKILLZ

I was 5 and a half hours late for work today; I shit
you not. I work just outside London, and I awoke in
Haslingden, Lancashire at 8 o clock. The reason for my
predicament is twofold, dear readers. I can put it
down to clumsiness and drink. I drove up on Saturday
to see my friends, parked up about half-five and went
for a pint. When I went to get the car and drive us
all home at 6:20, the buggers had locked the car park.
I made a few frantic calls next day, only to be told
the car park would not be opened until Monday morning;
the geezer with the keys was, and I quote, "In
Morecombe". Try telling your boss that you're nearly a
day late for work because some bloke is in Morecombe.
It doesn't go down too well.

B&S CONTENT

My mate Nicola plays in a band called Empress, and
they played up in Glasgow the other day, and
apparantly our Stuart went to see them! But only
stayed for about 3 minutes. According to Nicola, "I
think he turned up at the wrong club." I thought he
was meant to stay in his bedroom all the time anyway.
I feel cheated. As should he, he missed a treat by
leaving.

BRITISH TELLY

I love telly. I especially love The Royle Family and
identify very strongly with Anthony. I also like
Hollyoaks and that Hip-Hop programme. Doesn't Vanilla
Ice look funny these days? One time. That new show
with Denise Van Outen is the biggest shower of shite I
have ever seen on telly.

POP MUSIC

The band that I play in are supporting Mogwai in
Manchester on 19 October, so a big shout out to any
Manc Listees in the area, hope to see youse there.
You'll love it.

Massive love and respect,

Will x


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